The Procrastinator’s Guide to the Galaxy: McSweeney’s Open Letters


Well, Hoyas, that’s all she wrote. Not only has everyone finished classes for the school year, but everyone (in the Class of 2013) has also graduated. You might be thinking that you no longer have anything to procrastinate about, but I – along with this esteemed writer – completely disagree. You merely can shift your procrastination into its summer form, and without the stress of classes, you now have more time to do it!

For example, you might want to procrastinate on your summer reading. You might want to procrastinate on applying sunblock before going outside (though you should still apply it, because it is very good for your skin). You might even want to procrastinate putting on pants and leaving your bed in the morning … and you can because it’s summer vacation!

And what a better way to procrastinate on your summer activities than by reading McSweeney’s Open Letters to People or Entities Who Are Unlikely to Respond? We’ve had our fair share of open letters here on 4E (like this, this and this), though it’s safe to say that the hilariously outrageous letters on McSweeney’s put our snarky antics to shame.

Like who could resist this complaint to Jif? Or this one about the lifestyles of the newly graduated Hoyas? No matter which you choose, you’re set for gold.

Happy summer procrastination, Hoyas!

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