March Madness Advice

It’s official: March Madness is upon us. I’m told by some alumni that there was once a time when the Georgetown basketball team was part of this tournament, but much like the stories of the days when students allegedly “went to games” and “could name a player on the team,” I’m pretty sure this is just a rumor. Regardless, we here at 4E (AKA the ~real~ sports section of The Hoya) have come up with some helpful advice for building that perfect bracket.

When you see that Syracuse somehow made it in

Consider Picking Schools That Have Jack-Like Mascots

The real tragedy of us missing the tournament is that the world will be deprived of seeing our beloved Jack the Bulldog ride his skateboard or drive his car around the court. But luckily, March Madness will still have some canine representation. Here are some possible picks you should consider based on their potential for adorableness:

Gonzaga Bulldogs:

Their “dog” is named Spike. It’s just a guy in a suit. No actual dog. Disappointing. 2/10.

Butler Bulldogs:

Their dog is named Blue. He’s no Jack, but at least he’s an actual dog. Overall, pretty cute. Nice smile. Would definitely pet. 7/10.

UMBC (University of Maryland, Baltimore County) Retrievers:

The dog is named “True Grit”. Creative choice. Unclear if the mascot is “officially” just a guy in a suit, but according to Google Images, they seem to frequently have a plethora of live retrievers present at many events. I endorse this. Reminds me of Air Bud. 9/10.

      

 

Stay Away From the Big East

As many of you may know, many of the other teams in the Big East were very mean to the Hoyas this season. They often (very rudely) chose to score a lot of points and also frequently prevented us from scoring some points of our own. Very inconsiderate! Karma will not be kind to them in the tournament — stay away!

When someone says Villanova is going to win it all this year

Also, Providence has this horrifying mascot. We can’t pick them knowing this thing will be there.

It’s gonna be a no for me, dawg

Remember Your Jesuit Values

The Arizona State Sun Devils? The Duke Blue Devils? Not today, Satan! These squads are clearly trying to tempt you into straying from your Jesuit values. March Madness is no time for such sinful endeavors, my fellow men and women for others. We suggest you play it safe and stick with the Penn Quakers — based on what little information I remember from my sixth-grade social studies class  my extensive research, Quakers and Jesuits are essentially the same thing.

Also, remember that Penn once kindly took Ivanka off our hands, further proving their charitable nature (#NotMyFirstDaughter #WhyIsGeorgetownAssociatedWithSoManyTrumpChildren #TiffanyActuallySeemsOkThough). With all this in mind, Penn is pretty much a surefire pick for the Final Four.

When God sees you filling out your bracket

Don’t Pick Michigan State.

This one may seem both arbitrary and contrary to popular opinion, but remember this: current star player and probable future lottery pick Jaren Jackson Jr. chose Michigan State over Georgetown. Yes, way back in 2016, the highly touted recruit included Georgetown among his final five school choices and then somehow didn’t pick us. Wyd Jaren?? Didn’t the tour guides tell you about new Leo’s? Were you not impressed by Lau? Did the rats scare you off??

Whatever the reason, to quote the internship rejection emails I keep getting, we’ve unfortunately “decided to go in a different direction” on this one and cannot recommend that our readers pick Michigan State. And if you’re reading this, Jaren Jackson Jr., please consider forgoing your lucrative NBA career in favor of transferring to the Hilltop next year. Patrick Ewing is really cool and some students will probably show up at a home game at some point. Also, we have a Chick-Fil-A now!

Bet you thought all my advice was going to be based solely on mascots, didn’t you? #insightful

And finally….

Do Not Pick Syracuse

Enough said.

We hope you have fun this month, and remember: next year will be better! We look forward to seeing you all at the Arena Formerly Known as the Verizon Center for the one game you’ll attend before leaving early to go to Rocket Bar.

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, pinterest.com, golfdigest.com, kentuckysportsradio.com

Georgetown V Syracuse: Leo’s Goes Orange FREE

Banner - Oranges

Don’t go to Leo’s Friday thinking there’s even a remote chance you’ll be able to find your daily vitamin C in an orange, because there won’t be any.

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Don’t plan on stocking up on goldfish,

Don’t crave cantaloupe,

There won’t be any orange soda,

nor will there be orange juice,

There will be no cheddar cheese,

Leo’s will be orange FREE!

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       To prep for the game this Saturday, Georgetown Dining is committed to ridding Leo’s of all things orange so that neither the students nor the basketball players will consumer orange before the big game against Syracuse. “We’re responsible for feeding the team and staff three meals a day and won’t take a chance serving anything remotely orange that could have a negative impact on the result of the game,” Marketing Director Adam Solloway said. “This goes for students as well.” 

Show your school spirit and tweet with the hashtag #BOOrange to @georgetowndining

Photos: washingtonpost.com, giphy.com, espn.com

Senior Memories: Things that Only Seniors Remember

SENIORS

As the first semester has begun to wind down, my nerves about leaving Georgetown in only a few months are increasing. I can barely remember my freshman year, the people I met then feel like people I have known my entire life. However, there are some things that have not been so permanent. From bars to fads, Georgetown has seen a bunch of turnover during the last three years.

So underclassmen, give me this one post to rant. And seniors, join me in my trip down memory lane.

Things Only Seniors Remember:

1. Tuscany’s. The pride and joy of our freshman year. If you didn’t sit on the sidewalk with a large slice, make friends with a stranger or get into a fight about who ordered first than you haven’t lived.

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2. Rhino. Okay, some underclassman might remember this one. But, only we remember how magical Rhino was once upon a time. Do I miss the idea of it? Yes. Do I actually miss it? To be honest, not at all.

3. Shit Georgetown Girls Say. This video defined my freshman year, and I still recite it weekly. While I was heartbroken that these guys took this video down, I am still petitioning for them to bring it back. Favorite lines include:

  • “Does Rhino take Go-Card?”
  • “What to chase with, what to chase with.. Diet Coke, zero cals!”
  • “Betch I’m drunk in Leo’s I need your help.”
  • “He must be cute, he went to Delbarton.”
  • “Son of a betch where is my Go-Card?”

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5. Reiss Pathway. As a former Darnallian, the Reiss Pathway was basically family to me. Best people watching and easy access to Leavy… what more could you want?! It makes me so incredibly sad that some people think that the construction has always been there. They don’t know the great things they have missed.

6. Omelet Lady. Feel free to correct me, as I have not been to Leo’s in a while, but I’ve heard that the omelet lady no longer exists? How does one get his or her omelet without the signature “getcha omelet” call? That was the only acceptable way to end a weekend.

7. New South before the Heal Fam Stu Cen. I had to explain to a freshman the other day what was in the HFSC’s place prior to its creation… and all I could say was nothing. It literally seems like that building sprung from nowhere. If only it had been around my freshman year, I probably would have been more inclined to study!

8. Leo’s Burrito Bowls. Ugh, back when Leo’s did so many things right. Their burrito bowls were my favorite thing. Like Chipotle, but from a meal swipe! You didn’t even have to pay extra for guac!!
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9. Juicing ‘Cuse in 1 Season. Way back when Syracuse was in the Big East. We were so lucky to see 2 wins against ‘Cuse in only one season. Hopefully we can juice ‘Cuse again this year on Dec. 5!

10. Epi before it became a hotspot. My underclassman sources have informed me that Epi is the new “late night hot spot.” Back in my day, it was just a great place to get a quesadilla and chill with friends. I guess we can blame the loss of both Tuscany’s and Eat & Joy for this one!

Photos/Gifs: huffingtonpost.com; giphy.com; hercampus.com

This Day In Hoya History: Still Ballin’ Since 1994

TDIHHWell, Hoyas, it’s that time again: time for another installment of This Day In Hoya History. Today’s segment takes us back almost 20 years to a time when this batch of freshmen and sophomores were born: 1994! Even though some things are radically different, a lot of things haven’t changed at all.

For one, Darnall was still a hot mess. (This writer wishes no disrespect to the “Dirty-D,” yo.) It just so happened that in 1994, vast quantities of unforwarded mail found themselves in some Darnall recycling bins. If you’re thinking this type of behavior is against regulation, it is – and consequently, the U.S. Postal Service wasn’t too happy about the Georgetown University post office’s actions. Take a look below:photo 4

Speaking of things that went against regulation, crime was a top problem in 1994. Back then, the most common problem on campus was theft, with 183 thefts occurring in 1993. Recently The Hoya reported increased overall crime rates in 2012, with 235 thefts taking place in the past year.

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Other things stayed the same, too. Our ballers still balled…photo 3

… the N.S.A. was still recruiting …

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… and we liked Syracuse? (Writers note: I can’t even fathom why The Hoya ran this advertisement and I’m questioning both their judgment and their sanity.)photo 2

Maybe some things have changed since 1994 after all. Keep up with all your 2013 midterms and keep tuning in to everything 4E has to offer. Until our next Hoya History installment, Hoyas.

(P.S. Syracuse sucks.)

Gadzooks! Where’d Our Seal Go?

School SealUh-oh-spaghetti-oh! Heavens to Mergatroid! It’s a John Carroll conundrum. From the looks of it, the Georgetown University school seal on the steps outside of Healy Hall seems to have disappeared – just in time for Homecoming Weekend.

In other words, what is supposed to look like this…

5863016890_a72c2934b9_z …currently looks like this:

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Though we haven’t received word yet on the seal’s whereabouts or why it has gone missing (or potentially covered), we do have some wild speculations of our own about the disappearance. Take a look at them below:

1. A heartbroken Hoya alum stole the seal upon returning to campus for homecoming so he/she could keep a piece of Georgetown forever.

2. The University – in anticipation of our new mascot’s homecoming debut – took the seal away in case “new” Jack needed a bathroom break.

3. Someone from Syracuse just performed an elaborate heist to ruin Georgetown’s homecoming … Just kidding. Nobody from Syracuse could think of something that elaborate.

4. A prospective student who had previously stepped on the seal (and was subsequently denied from the University) destroyed the seal because he/she was denied entry to the best place on Earth.

5. Blue and Grey Tour Guides stole it so they could have some new material for their fall tours.

6. The University stole it and moved it to Clarendon, despite the results of the referendum voting. 

7. This is a part of Nicholas Cage’s newest movie National Treasure: Georgetown where he steals Georgetown landmarks. LOOK OUT, JOHN CARROLL.

8. A Mr. Georgetown candidate made it disappear as a part of his talent for tonight.

What are your theories, Hoyas? Where’s the seal? Check The Hoya for all the latest updates!

Photo: Adam Ramadan, flickr, wikimedia

The Syverud Betrayal

SYVREUD

Here’s a quick list of things Hoyas should never do:

Step on the seal (most people avoid that entrance to Healy all together).

Speak ill of any of the West Wing characters (but there’s nothing bad to say anyway).

Fail to pick up a copy of The Hoya every Tuesday and Friday (they’re all over campus, so it’s kind of impossible).

Become the President of Syracuse University (PSH, like anyone would do THAT!)

—–

Wait, what’s that you say? Someone did that last thing? A Hoya, Kent D. Syverud, (SFS ’77) was just named the 12th Chancellor and President of Syracuse University?

This could be considered the ultimate betrayal by some, but we at The Fourth Edition are hoping that Syverud is secretly a double agent, hoping to infiltrate deep into the Syracuse University infrastructure.

We all know that the Georgetown-Syracuse rivalry is one that will not be quelled simply by a shifting around of conferences, and we hope it will remain alive and well with a Hoya at the helm of the Orange forces.

Good luck at the new job, but we’ve got our eye on you.

Photo: The Washington Post

Juicing ‘Cuse: Past and Present

source: https://theessentialsofcool.tumblr.com/post/3962987728/patrick-ewing-33-ferociously-dunks-over

Hatred runs high for the Syracuse Orangemen among all Hoyas, past and present. This rivalry comes to a forefront each year in the Big East matchup of the two teams in men’s basketball. As we await the 7 p.m. tip-off of tonight’s highly anticipated game, alumni Katie Collins (COL ’83) speaks of the long-standing Syracuse-Georgetown rivalry during her time at Gtown:

I remember as a Georgetown freshman during the 1979-1980 season, the Hoyas had beaten some top 20 teams, including nationally-ranked Syracuse early on, yet Georgetown continued to be ranked low in the polls and much lower than Syracuse for many weeks, infuriating Hoya fans, especially students. The team still played at McDonough Gym then, Patrick Ewing would not join the team for two more seasons, but Georgetown was increasingly being recognized as an up and coming basketball contender and the newly-formed Big East made the competition between Georgetown and Syracuse all the more fierce.

The rivalry between Georgetown and Syracuse continued to escalate with Ewing’s dominance in national basketball, bringing the Hoyas to their first NCAA finals his freshman season in March 1982. The intensity became more personal when Syracuse fans threw bananas at Ewing when he was shooting from the foul line during a game in the Carrier Dome. This was captured on national television and only fueled the rivalry. Hoya student fans from those years remember attending Georgetown-Syracuse games in the Carrier Dome in which they were pummeled with oranges following a Syracuse loss.

Photo: theessentialsofcool.tumblr.com