Posted on

An Open Letter to Mother Nature

To: Mother Nature
Cc: Mr. Sun, Jack Frost, President Obama
Bcc: Mom
Subject: WWTWD? (What will the weather do? Duh.)

—

Dear Mother Nature,

As a D.C. citizen and a lover of weather-appropriate fashion, I want to (read: must) express to you my ultimate confusion. I simply do not know what shenanigans you are trying to bring upon the District of Columbia.

Exhibit A
We went from this…

tumblr_mzkpcjh8HV1sj5h4oo1_1280

… to this …

hot … in a matter of four days.

Hello? Is this a joke? Am I getting punk’d?

I mean really, come on. It is February. No one loves spring as much as I do, but all of these weather changes are totally messing with my head — and don’t get me started on what this is doing to my closet.

Example: Yesterday I wanted to take a nice walk down to Chipotle because it was beautiful and warm out. What happens? Ice, and then snow and then all of a sudden I was on the floor.

I slipped and fell.

Please, explain this to me. It was 60 degrees out. There should not be snow on the ground. I should be basking in the sunlight, not laying in a pile of dirty winter precipitation.

What do you think this is, Canada? We ALL know the real reason we came to D.C. was because it has warmer weather than our northern neighbors. It is the thing that I brag about every time I see my family — and I am from Long Island, not Antarctica.

The worst part about these crazy weather patterns is how it is messing up Georgetown’s style. I have seen everything from woolen sweaters to shorts to heavy down coats in the span of a day. That is not normal and, honestly, it just makes me want to cry.

So please, Mother Nature, next time you feel like going on a weather bender, keep in mind that I, Courtney Klein, will not be happy.

Also, I blame you for my cold. You should honestly be trying to get on my good side. Please step up your game before I apply to a school in a normal city.

Sincerely,
Courtney Klein

Photo: Huffington Post; Gifs: tumblr
Posted on

Snowpocalypse 2014: The Sequel

MeowThe rumors are true. The weather updates are right. D.C. is about to be hit with some major snowfall. As of this moment, we are officially under a “snow emergency.”

According to www.weather.com, the snow should start falling around 9 p.m., and will continue for pretty much all of Thursday. The total snowfall should be anywhere from five to ten inches, with some experts even predicting a foot. (Begin freaking out now.)

Judging by Georgetown’s last declared snow day, which amounted to significantly less than tonight’s predicted amounts, we should probably expect no classes tomorrow. (Refer to 4E’s guide for snow days accordingly. And just in case, do these rituals to make sure we have off tomorrow.)

But a snow emergency isn’t all fun and games. The snow will eventually turn into freezing rain, which means icy conditions.

But never fear! D.C.’s District Snow Team (things I learned today: this exists) is primed and ready to break out all 287 snow plows in its arsenal, along with presumably a ton of salt, in an effort to combat Mother Nature. Either way, one thing is clear: Snow is coming, so get ready for either playing outside or hiding indoors. Happy Second Snowpocalypse, Hoyas!

Special thanks to DCist for this article.

Photos: dumpaday.com, GIFs: dailydot.com, buzzfeed.com, weber-street-photography.com