Leo’s Health Inspection Isn’t Pretty


We all know Leo’s sucks. Like, really sucks. They’ve got the perfect unethical trifecta of monopoly: crappy food, overpriced meals and mandatory plans. They’ve got us right where they want us.

But we have the reports from Leo’s official health inspection a few months ago, and apparently Leo’s has a lot more than just a monopoly. Here are a few things we know they have after this inspection:

Mice droppings in the dessert storage trays
Have you ever felt like your chocolate chip cookie had a few extra chips in it? Or thought that there was a speck of dust on your brownie? Nope. It’s a special gift from a little furry friend.

No plan to deal with vomit
Have you ever gone to Leo’s with a bad hangover? Or seen a friend go when you know they’re too sick to go to class? Well, bad news. Leo’s doesn’t have a plan to deal with vomit (or any sort of disgusting bodily occurrence). So if someone were to throw up anywhere in the establishment, no one would know how to deal with it, making contamination of a lot of food very likely.

Employees who don’t wear gloves
There were multiple instances of employees touching “ready to eat foods” with their bare hands. This is not, “Oh don’t worry, the heat in the oven will kill the germs.” This is, “Okay I’m touching the broccoli and putting it directly onto your plate. Enjoy my germs!”

Crusted food residue on surfaces and equipment
We all knew this, we’re used to taking two or three dishes or bowls out of the dispenser before finding one that is clean enough to eat off of. It’s Leo’s way of giving us a little extra snack with every meal! Very common, still super disgusting.

Unsafe food temperatures
I won’t get into the specifics, mostly because I don’t know them, but basically food needs to be kept at a certain temperature for it to be safe to consume. And Leo’s is like, “Screw that!” So, yeah. Bacteria grow and stuff.

To the administration: This is a formal request for improvement. Leo’s was designated as a Risk Category of 3. It had four critical violations and one non-critical violation (with 6 violations, an establishment is shut down). This is kind of ridiculous.


Third-Year Meal Plan Requirement: The Conspiracy


When news of the possible third-year meal plan requirement broke this past week, students were infuriated, and rightly so. In case you didn’t hear news from any campus news source whatsoever, GUSA announced in a press release that the administration is considering implementing a third-year meal plan requirement.

While the most obvious reason for doing this is to boost revenue, my inner conspiracy theorist doesn’t buy it. The university can’t seriously be considering this plan — that they had to know would outrage students — without some ulterior motive. And 4E is here to wildly speculate about what those motives could be.

To distract students from the massive impending construction Unfortunately, this Monday, the East Reiss pathway and Leavey bridge will be closed indefinitely due to construction. By introducing this ridiculous meal plan proposal, the administration was clearly trying to pull students’ attention away from the construction to this new annoying university endeavor. Then, when the meal proposal magically doesn’t pass, we’ll all feel a sense of victory as we inconveniently walk around the west side of Reiss without complaint.

The university seriously screwed up their budget With the cost of the new HFSC and Northeast Triangle construction, financial constraints have to be pretty high right now. They’re probably too embarrassed to try to solicit more alumni donations, and so they have to resort to literally siphoning money from current students. Probably the most likely explanation.

They’re using this to cover up some other thing that students would get more upset about This is the best conspiracy theory because it’s open-ended. Maybe UIS is responsible for hacking Snapchat? Just think of all the stories we don’t know about because we’re all up in arms about this new proposal instead of looking for another piece of journalistic gold.

And now you know what went through my mind when I heard this news.

Gif: imgur.com; Photo: hdwallpapersfactory.com