Manly Monday – The Fourth Edition

March 16, 2015

Manly Monday: The Real March Madness

In case you haven’t heard, it’s time for everyone’s favorite season: March Madness! The NCAA Basketball Championship Tournament begins this week, and everyone is scrambling to fill out a bracket or do some last minute scouting on this year’s Cinderella Story (anyone but Eastern Washington, please).

But you can tune into any sports show and get your fill of bracketology talk, so we won’t bore you with that here on Manly Monday. Instead, it is time for an in-depth look at a true art-form that is perhaps this manly man’s favorite part of playing basketball: The bench.

Ahhh, the bench. When you’re younger, the bench is the last place you want to be during a game, much less watch. However, as you advance into higher competition, riding the pine takes on added importance.

College players who once dominated in high school have to find some way to contribute to their team, even if they don’t get any minutes on the court. This can result in some unbelievable celebrations, and quite a bit of added entertainment to your game-watching experience. Here are just a few classic “cellies” to look out for while watching March Madness.

BENCH

No one is really going to leave the bench out of excitement. But just in case, this brave Hoosier acts like a seatbelt for his fellow players.

The Three-Point Monocle

This one can be done any time, anywhere, once a teammate hits a three-pointer. This Butler Bulldog just brings so much energy to a simple celebration. Good for him.

The Archer

An impressive take on another old classic, always be aware of archers on the bench. This guy even has his own spotter. For being players at Villa-no-fun, the bench at least has a good time.

Air Guitar

Definitely the most relatable celebration. I know everyone has dreamed of playing the air guitar on national TV. Some people just have all the luck.

Untitled

No real creativity here, just pure, unadulterated excitement. Critics have been harsh on Texas sneaking into the tournament this year, but if nothing else, their bench earned them a shot at the spotlight.

Finally, one last shoutout has to go to the Colby University basketball program. They won’t be dancing on a national stage this year, but I’m sure their bench players will be dancing somewhere. Check out this clip of arguably the best bench crew around.

Love the game, hate the game, it doesn’t matter: everyone can enjoy March Madness if you know where to look. Happy benching, and go Hoyas!

Gifs: USA Today; Next Impulse Sport; Complex

February 9, 2015

Manly Monday: The Valentine’s Day Bro-Date

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner (Saturday!), so naturally the talk of the town (and Yik Yak) is all about big plans on the 14th.

While couples are all excited to go out on fancy dates, possibly the more vocal crowd are those people without dates. For those bros and manly men out there without a special someone to take out on the town, here are some suggestions for a great bro date on Saturday.

Disney on Ice: Worlds of Fantasy Tour. I was going to suggest a sporting event at the Verizon Center, but apparently this is the one weekend this winter that The Phonebooth won’t play host to the Wizards, Capitals, Hoyas or WWE SmackDown. Go figure. Disney on Ice would still be a lot of fun though.

NBA All-Star Saturday Night. There might not be any games in town, but Saturday is an exciting night for televised sports. The NBA is holding their All-Star Saturday Night, and it always provides some thrills. Grab your buddies, pick up some wings and kick back watching the best players in the world shoot, dribble and dunk.

Hit the Movies. AMC Loews, down on the Waterfront, has some great movies showing. Nothing wrong with bonding with your bros over a nice Hollywood blockbuster. Plus, you should be able to get great seats in any screening you want, because everyone else will be seeing Fifty Shades of Grey.

Shoot Some Hoops. Yates will probably be pretty empty because everyone else will be on dates, so you and your buddies can have the court to yourself. Play some pick-up, H-O-R-S-E, knockout – you just have to be done by 10:00 pm.

Play Water-Pong. It’s like shooting hoops, but with cups and ping-pong balls. You could even set up a tournament.

Spring Cleaning. If you and all your roommates are staying in, just get a nice cleaning session in. That way, you will be prepared for the nights you do have a date.

Start a Band. You never know where this one could lead. Don’t know how to play any instruments? Now is your time to learn! Some of the world’s greatest bands started in garages – why not a Village A?

Watch I Love You, Man The ultimate bromance film, nothing says “guy time” quite like “I Love You, Man”. If you haven’t seen it, you should check it out. If you have, I’d recommend watching it again. Plus, it may inspire you to follow up on our band suggestion.

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!

This post was co-written by fellow manly-man Drew Applebaum.

Photos/Gifs: Giphy.com; Tumblr.com

December 29, 2014

Manly Mondays: Bros Being Basic on Instagram

One of the tenants of “basicness” is (apparently) an affinity for stereotypical posts on Instagram of things like Starbucks lattes, nature shots and Healy Hall.

For those of you who don’t know, Instagram is a platform that allows, and sometimes encourages, even the most manly bros to sway towards “being basic.”

The quest for likes on a post brings out throwbacks, pet pictures, sunsets and Christmas cards. While I will admit to being guilty to posting (almost) all of the above, someone has decided to compile the most basic bros on Instagram, and I haven’t quite made the cut. I present to you: Bros Being Basic.

This account is made up of fan-submitted pictures, and the bros out there have not disappointed. Here are some of 4E’s favorite submissions from the broiest bros of the web.

While most bros will take a solid Christmas card picture with their “boys”, these guys pulled off one of my favorites.

One of the original submissions to the account, I guess everyone is thankful for Ryan Gosling, even if they won’t admit it publicly.

Just a couple bros out bro-skating on their bro date. Nothing wrong with that.

The classic “we are all dressed up nicely, so let’s take a picture of us jumping in the air.” Doesn’t get more “basic” than that. Except…

Cheesy/heartwarming caption? Check. Matching outfits? Check. Unbelievable sunset and scenery? Check and check. Could this be the most “basic” photo any bro has ever posted? Possibly. However, they just set the bar incredibly high for what constitutes a good ‘Gram.

Think you and your bros have what it takes to be featured with other Bros Being Basic? Submit a picture to [email protected], and maybe you’ll be featured in a Manly Monday someday.

Photos: Bros Being Basic, Instagram

November 17, 2014

Manly Monday: Our First PSL

The PSL. The drink of choice for the “basic” Georgetown population. Today, two men of 4E confronted gender norms and took a stab at ordering the signature autumn drink.

Placing the Order

Kyle and I waited in nervous anticipation as we approached the register of the Leavey Starbucks. A male employee was taking orders, though we didn’t know if that would make the experience any easier. Kyle placed the order. We watched as the employee did a double take, a grin curling on his face as he registered what was occurring. He tried to suppress the urge to laugh and succeeded. But Kyle and I knew what was going through his head. After we paid the ridiculous $4.35 for a Tall Pumpkin Spice Latte, we took our spot waiting at the bar.

Getting Our Cup

Again, anticipation built. Would the woman reading names laugh? Would the customers notice? As names were called out loudly for the entire coffee shop to hear, we waited. Finally, we heard “tall pumpkin spice latte”. Kyle rushed to the bar, hoping to grab the drink before his name was called. Not a chance. Before placing the drink on the bar, the employee loudly called out Kyle’s name. As he took the drink, they made eye contact, and she couldn’t help but smirk. “Have a nice day” she said with a chuckle. Kyle’s eyes darted the floor as he took the cup, hoping to avoid the judgmental gazes of other customers as we exited the Starbucks.

The First Sip

Kyle: This tastes like liquified pumpkin pie. It’s actually not that bad.

Max: It tastes like I’m drinking a candle. But I kind of like it.

A few sips later…

Kyle: I don’t know if I can finish this. The sweetness is hard to bear.

Max: Word. This is too sweet. How do people drink this?

Kyle: Yeah, we’re too manly.

The Conclusion

After a few more sips, Kyle and I called it quits. We were unable to finish our first (and last) PSL. We were pleasantly surprised by the first sips, but quickly realized it was not the drink for us. For you PSL fans out there, keep on keeping on. These manly men of 4E just couldn’t handle the intensity of your favorite drink.

Authors: Max “I’m too cool to drink a candle” Wheeler and Kyle “me too” Murphy

September 22, 2014August 17, 2015

Manly Monday: Fantasy Football Punishments

Ron Swanson once said, “The only thing I hate more than lying is skim milk, which is water lying about being milk.”

What does this have to do with 4E, you might ask? Starting this week, the “men” of 4E will be running Manly Monday posts, bringing you the whole milk of blog posts. With Ron Swanson, the epitome of manhood in mind, we bring you the first every Manly Monday. Enjoy.

(Disclaimer: These posts apply to everyone. Not just men.)

The NFL is back in full swing, which means it is fantasy football season for the less-athletically-gifted among us. Leagues amongst friends can get incredibly competitive as people vie for bragging rights, money or some form of reward from the rest of the league. In some leagues, though, the focus shifts from the winner to the loser. Instead of prizes, the commish doles out punishments. Without further ado, here are some of 4E’s favorite league punishments.

The Waiter This one can take on a lot of different forms. The gist is that the last place finisher has to serve the league-winner in some fashion. This can be serving dinner at Leo’s, grabbing snacks/beverages on game day or even doing the winner’s laundry. It’s up to you.

The Name Change This one is more for leagues that play every year, but put simply, the winner gets to choose the loser’s team name for the entire next season (for those less-avid fantasy football fans, team names are taken VERY seriously). Also, the winner could choose to change the loser’s Twitter handle for a certain period of time. Just another take on it.

The Apology The loser of the league must send a letter to the parents of each league member, apologizing for wasting their son/daughter’s time all season. It’s nice, though not necessary, if league dues can cover the mailing costs.

Public Humiliation There are a lot of options with this punishment as well. This could entail performing at an open-mic night, karaoke night, bursting out into song at Leo’s, really anything. While singing is usually entertaining, embarrassing costumes are always fun too.

The SAT Our final punishment is the punishment for the loser in a league I am in. As the name suggests, the league loser must relive the awful four-plus-hour experience that is the SAT. You can either send the loser to a local high school to take the real test, or proctor it yourselves. I would recommend setting a minimum score he/she must receive to prevent intentional failing.

And for those of your that aren’t getting your fantasy fix through your leagues and aforementioned punishments, now we have short-term fantasy sports sites like Fan Duel and Draft Kings. Check out this awesome analysis to see how the two compare.

Good luck and Godspeed to those of you playing fantasy football this season; hopefully none of you will be completing punishments come January.

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