Summer 2017: Important News Updates

While it seems like just yesterday we were gracing the floors of Lau with our last-minute study guides and caffeine-fueled tears, Summer 2017 is  officially in full swing nevertheless. We know it can be hard to keep up with the headlines when you’re away from the Hilltop, so we here at 4E have compiled a convenient list of the most important things to happen this summer (so far). Take a break from lying in bed binge-watching Netflix working hard at your prestigious internship and enjoy!

Taylor Swift Put Her Music Back on Spotify Like many of you, I endured the #struggle of having to actually purchase songs on iTunes after Taylor took all her music off of Spotify back in 2014 (full disclosure: “Shake It Off” is my anthem. I will likely walk down the aisle at my wedding to this song.) But a few weeks ago, T-Swift fans across the globe rejoiced as her songs suddenly reappeared on the music-streaming platform. Adding to the drama, this move not-so-coincidentally came on the same day as the album release of her famous frenemy, Katy Perry. In other words, Taylor Swift has taken the definition of “petty” to a whole new level this summer.

Beyoncé Had Twins As expected, Beyoncé gave birth to twins and continued her reign of ruling the universe that began way back in 1999 upon the release of “Say My Name.” While pictures of her twins have not yet been released at the time of this publication, we can confirm that they will undoubtedly be cooler and more stylish than I could ever hope to be, as evidenced by the fact that their older sister Blue Ivy is already way ahead of me in terms of both coolness and style.

With genes like this, the rest of us don’t stand a chance

“The Floor Is” Became the Hottest Meme Like many of you, our primary form of communication here at 4E is tagging one another in memes on various social media platforms. Based on our own personal experience, we can definitively say that “The Floor Is” is the hottest meme of the summer so far. For those of you who are over the age of 23 and/or those of you who somehow don’t spend every waking moment staring at your phone, here is Knowyourmeme.com’s official definition to help you better understand: “The Floor Is… refers to an exploitable two-panel photo series featuring  a person avoiding the floor, as they would in The Floor is Lava/Hot Lava Game. It has been used to make image macros about actions that one person will try their best to avoid doing.” See visual examples below.

The Trump Administration Left the Paris Climate Agreement This pretty much sums it up…

Josh Peck Didn’t Invite Drake Bell to His Wedding This one is by far the saddest moment of the summer and possibly even the saddest thing to happen to anyone ever. Josh did not invite the other half of “Drake and Josh: to his wedding. Across the world, millennials wept and wondered: how could this happen? Where did it all go wrong? Did we do something to cause this? Was Megan somehow involved? We may never know what exactly spurred the saddest breakup since the Jonas Brothers disbanded, but we can only hope that these two “brothas” will eventually move beyond this tragedy and hug it out.

Also, do we know if Amanda Bynes was invited? Asking for a friend.

So there you have it: the most important things to happen this summer…so far. Stay tuned for our next edition, and in the meantime, enjoy your summers!

Photos/Gifs/Sources: giphy.com, knowyourmeme.com, ryanair.com/blog, tumblr.com

Dating Advice from Donald Trump

Hear ye, hear ye! A proclamation to all the Georgetown romantics looking for or currently involved in a loving relationship: Valentine’s Day is just around the corner! You may think that you are an expert on the lovely world of dating, but there can only be one true master. And that master just happens to be the President of the United States. We here at 4E have searched for and archived some of our new President’s greatest pieces of advice just for you!

Follow this advice and you can be            just like The Donald!

Have no tolerance for cheaters.

The fall of 2012 was a rocky time for everyone’s former favorite celebrity couple, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. With allegations of cheating by Kristen Stewart running amuck, many were outraged–including America’s very own, Donald Trump.

In the span of approximately one month, our President tweeted a total of 6 times voicing his opinions on what Robert Pattinson should do about his former partner’s infidelity. The rampage begins with the following remarks made on October 17, 2012:

While this tweet includes a few troubling remarks, the overall message is clear–Robert Pattinson should not tolerate cheating and neither should you.

Have high standards for yourself.

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are not the only celebrity couple Donald Trump felt the irresistible desire to weigh in on. He also simply had to tell the world his opinion of Katy Perry and Russel Brand as well. On October 16, 2014, Donald Trump sent the following tweet.

Considering he is the father of two daughters, it should come as no surprise that Donald Trump has taken the “over-protective-dad” approach to this one. He only wants the best for Katy and you. Find yourself a significant other who’s got more going on than Russel Brand and don’t settle for anything less.

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Don’t date unattractive people (inside and out).

On August 28, 2012, Donald Trump offered a compliment to the husband of Arianna Huffington for his decision to divorce his wife.

Donald Trump raises some very important points here. Physical and emotional attraction are key for any relationship to flourish. In this tweet, Donald Trump also displays a clear understanding of how sexuality works–Arianna Huffington’s former husband was clearly so repulsed by the unattractiveness of his wife that he became gay.

If this does not show Donald Trump’s support of LGBTQ rights, I don’t know what does.

Don’t date your daughter.

While I thought this was an unspoken rule, Donald Trump has made it very clear that you should not, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, date your daughter–no matter how attracted you are to her.

Donald Trump has often made remarks on the physical beauty of his daughter, Ivanka, in the past. In fact, on one 2006 episode of ABC’s “The View,”  “If Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.” I guess a biological, paternal relationship is simply an unfortunate deal breaker for our president.

That’s it for now kids! If you simply follow Donald Trump’s advice, you will wake up on Valentine’s Day with a relationship as strong and genuine as his and Melania’s.

Photos/gifs: twitter.com, giphy.com 

Josh Smith: Becoming a California Girl?

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Attention Georgetown basketball fans: the “Joshington Monument” might be moving across the country. This week it was revealed that not one but two former Big East centers are trying out for the Los Angeles Lakers: Georgetown’s Josh Smith and Xavier’s Matt Stainbrook.

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In the few months since the end of the season, Georgetown fans have remembered Josh Smith fondly, recalling his crucial rebounds and layups as well as a few in-game quips from announcers (“And here’s Josh Smith, rolling onto the court”).

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Hoya fans probably haven’t had a single positive thought about Stainbrook since the day Xavier joined the Big East in 2013: he led the largely unranked Musketeers to three disgusting wins over our Hoyas this season, including one in the semi-final of the conference tournament.

Here’s hoping that Josh has an awesome week with the Lakers and that Stainbrook, like, loses his glasses or something.

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Photos: twitter.com; usatoday.com; gannett-cdn.com

Friday Fixat10ns: Summer Countdown

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Somehow, it’s almost the end of the spring semester, and we only have a month until the next round of final exams. Winter coats are being put away for good, and the sun is finally coming out to play. However, we aren’t free just yet. We hope that our 4E playlist will provide you with the motivation that you need to make it through the final stretch.

Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You) – Kelly Clarkson I’ve heard the saying, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,” a million times, but, for some reason, when Kelly sings it, everything just clicks.

Firework – Katy Perry Yes, Katy, sometimes I do feel like a plastic bag. Don’t we all? No? Okay, maybe that’s just me. All I know is that this is the best pick-me-up song ever.

Pursuit of Happiness – Kid Cudi For some reason, taking my Developmental Cell Biology final exam or writing my USPS final paper isn’t my idea of happiness, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

What Makes You Beautiful – One Direction If you’re anything like me, then you’ve caught the One Direction bug. They know exactly what to say to a girl.

Numb – Linkin Park It’s never a good idea to bottle up stress so the next time that you’re angry at the world, just turn up this song and channel your inner rocker.

Fighter – Christina Aguilera You have to be a fighter in order to make it through the last month of school. Are you up for the battle?

Unwritten – Natasha Bedingfield Always remember that whatever happens in the next month does not define your life. Your life is unwritten, and you have the ability to do or be anything. Sorry, that just got really deep.

Never Say Never – Justin Bieber He may be on a slippery slope ever since his split with Selena, but this boy sure knows how to sing a catchy tune, regardless of how trite his lyrics may be.

One Step at a Time – Jordin Sparks I loved this girl ever since American Idol, and I love her now even more. And she’s completely correct  – we all just need to take each day as it comes. Before we know it, we’ll be packing up and heading home for the summer.

It’s My Life – Bon Jovi This song will be my anthem as I walk out of my last final exam. End of story.