A Freshman’s Guide to Manipulating Residential Living

Banner - Housing TipsIt’s that time of year for high school seniors. The time when they (those incoming freshman) fill out the famed Living Preference Questionnaire and begin the housing process. To all of you younglings, congratulations on your commitment to Georgetown. Now you finally can start making decisions about your freshmen year. What a time to be alive!

To all the current students, I’m sure you remember what it was like getting the first emails from housing. The excitement of ending high school and beginning college is something that almost everyone experiences. Housing was one of the first symbols of this change. No, we didn’t really care about the living survey. There were only two things that really mattered: our roommates and our housing assignments. We at least had some control over our roommate if we used the infamous CHARMS system. Let’s just say this works out better for some than it does for others.On the other hand, most of us had no control over our housing assignment.  There were maybe one or two little-known ways to work the system. Other than that, we were on our own. We all prayed for New South and scoffed at Darnall. When assignments were released in August, reactions included joy, disappointment, indifference, and just downright shock. Residents of New South were ecstatic, residents of Darnall felt cheated, and the residents of Harbin and VCW figured they would be okay. Oh, and then there were those of us in VCE. Note to incoming students: Darnall is NOT THE WORST. I repeat, if you get Darnall, it is NOT the end of the world. You are at least with other freshmen (and mice/rats) who keep you company in your isolation. We VCEers are alone; we have barely any freshmen to whom we can turn. 

We all thought we just had bad luck. Unfortunately for us, we were wrong; we just didn’t know the tricks of the system! Fortunately for all new students, 4E is going to share some tips on how to cheat the housing system. While some might say that these tricks will not work, please just look at what happened with housing this year. Do you really think that outsmarting the housing system is hard? 

In order to make sure that you’re satisfied with your housing assignment, here are some neat ways you can manipulate the system and/or the Residential Living Staff.

  1. Request medical housing– This could be a power move for some people. Some current students were granted medical housing due to gluten allergies. While this may seem like a scam (which it is), it may get you into either VCW or even New South. Discover your hidden ailment, fall down a flight of stairs, make up a disease: do whatever you gotta do to get medical housing.
  2. Post your most embarrassing story in the GAAP Facebook Group– Posting in the GAAP group may indeed make you famous (just ask Alessandra Puccio). If you post a really embarrassing story about yourself, your name might just reach the ears of the Residential Living Staff. What better way to both get good housing and put yourself out there to your new classmates? Disclaimer: If you actually do this, people will know you when you arrive. Will people envy you? That depends on how great the story is. 
  3. Request a single sex floor– Usually, if you request a single sex floor, you’ll probably end up in VCW or Harbin. While neither of these options are the same as the coveted New South, they are not the worst housing options on campus. You also will definitely not get Darnall. Both offer central locations, and each have unique features. Harbin has the cluster formation, while VCW offers the two-winged design, straight hallways and private bathrooms. If I were you, I would hope for Harbin, since private bathrooms don’t thrill me that much.
  4. Go on Tinder and swipe right for an administrator– Todd Olsen, the Vice President for Student Affairs, is a man of mystery. Does he actually have a Tinder profile? Who knows. But if he does, take advantage of the situation. If he also swipes right on you, you’ll have an excellent bargaining chip in your possession. It may not even our dear friend Todd; it could be anyone high up in the administration. New South, here you come! (We are clearly joking…)
  5. Write a very large check– This almost maybe definitely work, but please don’t be that guy.

In the end, you should not stress too much about housing. No matter where you live as a freshman, you’ll end up making friends in your dorm. Even if you don’t, your friends are a stone’s throw away (except if they’re in Darnall). Just fill out the living survey and wait. Finally, for your housing assignment and more importantly, your roommate search…may the odds be ever in your favor.

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, studentliving,georgetown.edu

50 Things Better Than Georgetown’s Housing System

Banner - HousingThe spirit of Georgetown is the best of any schools’ in the country. The housing? Not so much. It’s hard to go a day without hearing someone complaining about something related to housing. Most recent, the ire of many students was directed at the housing process for next year and the fact that rising sophomores were often excluded from Phase I selection, whereas many rising juniors and even some seniors found that they wouldn’t be able to live in their most desired places.

In honor of this tragedy and many others (including, but definitely not limited to: vermin infestations, dirty carpets, sub-par plumbing, outdated fixtures/appliances), here is 4E’s list of… 50 Things Better Than Georgetown’s Housing:

  1. Instructional continuity
  2. Leo’s coffee
  3. Losing your GoCard
  4. 8am classes

    class sleeping
    @everyone
  5. Hot Chick and Chicken Madness not winning the GUSA election
  6. GUTS bus delays
  7. The laundry rooms’ notoriously useless dryers
  8. Going to Epi on a Sunday night, only to realize it’s closed
  9. SaxaNet
  10. GuestNet
  11. Getting one out of five classes during preregistration
  12. Our basketball team this yearbasetball
  13. Getting rejected from every club
  14. The bathrooms in Reiss
  15. When people are talking obnoxiously on Lau 3
  16. Rhino closing
  17. Kehoe field
  18. Constructionconstruction
  19. Running out of meal swipes
  20. Having meal swipes (and having to use them on Georgetown’s food)
  21. JT III
  22. Brown House not being a thing next year
  23. Doing a survey and not winning the promised gift card
  24. Getting hurt by the curve
  25. Missing Bill Clinton’s speech because you have class
  26. TAs
  27. Sending a well-formatted email to your professor and getting a one word reply
  28. Getting rejected from the GAAP group
  29. That one kid who incessantly posts in the GAAP group
  30. The GAAP group
  31. LL Lau
  32. Getting stuck behind a tour
  33. Roommates who snore (in which case, try this)
  34. Lecture captures
  35. GoCard swiping machines not working
  36. RATS

    rats
    Not amused, personally
  37. Having a final on the last day of finals
  38. Georgetown Cupcakes lines
  39. When the professor shows up seconds before the class would have been cancelled
  40. Getting the snow day email after you’ve already gotten out of bed
  41. Having to give directions to a lost stranger on campus
  42. DC’s humidity in the summerdamn hot
  43. Trying to get a timely appointment at the Student Health Center
  44. The fact that we don’t have a metro stop
  45. Our NCAA appearance this year (lol)
  46. Hoverboards being banned on campus
  47. Class in Walsh and St. Mary’s back-to-back
  48. Seeing 38592740372 pictures of cherry blossoms on Instagram
  49. Being haunted
  50. Nothing

In other words, the only thing worse than the housing system, is the housing system itself. Here’s to another year in Henle.

Photos/Gifs: flickr.com, giphy.com

Roommate Proposal Songs

roomieproposal

Despite the snow and the cold, Spring is just around the corner, along with everyone’s favorite time of year: Housing Selection!

Last year, we taught you how to break up with your roommate without hurting their feelings too much. However, we realized that sometimes it can be just as hard asking someone new to live with you. So, for those of you that may be shy and/or lacking in creativity, but also want to make a sterling impression on your soon-to-be roommate, here are some pre-written proposal songs to really steal their hearts.

“Ignition (Roommate Remix)”– (Sung over the chorus of R. Kelly’s Ignition (Remix))

This is the remix to Ignition,

I need a roommate edition,

I really want an apartment,

So we can have our own kitchen,

I go out and have fun,

I don’t puke when I’m drunk,

I clean my own dishes, baby

And you can have bottom bunk.

“Party In Village A” (Miley Cyrus’ Party in the USA)

So I’ll hang my clothes up,

Play the right songs,

And throw all my trash away,

Makin’ my bed like yeah,

Doin’ my dishes like yeah,

I’ll turn my fan up,

Keep the room cool,

You know I’m gonna be OK,

Yeah, yeah, yeah,

It’ll be a party in Vil A.

“Live With Me” (Sam Smith’s Stay With Me)

Oh won’t you, live with me

‘Cause you’re nice and clean,

I just want a Village B,

So darling live with me.

“All of Me” (John Legend’s All of Me)

‘Cause all of me,

Wants to live with all of you,

We could have some dope gaming sessions,

Share our food and our possessions,

Give your all to me,

I’ll give my all to you,

We’ll split the booze and all the cleaning,

Even have snow day movie screenings,

Cause I give you all of me,

And you give me all of you.

 

Sure, housing can be stressful. But once you’ve decided who you want to live with, the proposal should be the easy part. Just pop on some background music and serenade your future roomie, and you’ll be signing up for the lottery in no time.

Photo: https://southernbridal.com/

Best of 4E: 2014 Edition

Best of 2014

2014 is over! That’s right folks, another year has come and gone, and what do we have to show for it? Well, in 4E’s case, a bunch of articles. We’ve compiled a list of 4E’s 25 greatest hits written this year, ranked in order of page views. Read on and enjoy:

Georgetown-Themed Pickup LinesAn instant classic. Any of these lines were and are perfect, whether you’re chatting with that hottie in Problem of God or meeting Bill Clinton.

Lau is Soul-CrushingAnd will never not be.

Mr. Georgetown 2014Go back to the article now and change your vote to Thomas Lloyd, so you can say you were right all along.

Embassy Row Trick-or-TreatingCulture and candy, a feast for the brain and the sweet tooth.

Healy Clock Hands Went Bye-ByeUntil they were replaced one day later.

Naming the HealFamStuCentThat’s the nickname we decided on, right?

Georgetown Day EveLess than four months until Georgetown Day 2015!

Second Semester Senior ShenanigansFor all the SWUGs out there.

Tombs Cancels Wine NightSorry, SWUGs.

Things Students Would Never SayNever say never! Someday the HFSC seating will make sense!

JesRes Dorm DeetsHousing Is Coming.

Georgetown Students = Olivia PopeUh, we wish.

Georgetown 2048We know you still play it.

Wills and Kate Come to DCCome back soon, friends!

Georgetown Reacts to FergusonMany extremely insightful words from faculty and students alike.

If a GUSA Campaign Doesn’t Have a Video, Are They Even Running for GUSA? Hint: The answer is no.

Top Hoya Comments EverBecause Internet commenters are the best!

Reiss Pathway Forever In Our HeartsI dreamed a dream in time gone by…

HFSC Open for BusinessBringing another factor into the “Where should I go to study tonight?” game, which inevitably ends in hiding under the covers and watching old “30 Rock” episodes. 

4E Blogger Is Also Georgetown Confessions PhenomHe was written about thrice. THRICE!

Last-Minute CostumesYou’re not fooling anyone with your “Georgetown Student” costume, bud.

Who Stole the Hands? We know it was you, Joey B. Ugh, you’re such a Scorpio!

Which Georgetown Alum Are You? Are you more Patrick Ewing or Nick Kroll? The answer may surprise you!

Concert for Valor MixHeard Ri-Ri and Bruce killed it.

Thanks to all our readers for a wonderful year! Catch you guys in 2015!

Everything You Need to Know About the New JesRes Dorm

New JesRes

As many of our readers may have noticed, there’s been quite a lot of construction on campus these days. While we’ve written extensively on the casualties of the Reiss walkway construction, there’s also an active construction site where the former Jesuit Residence is located. In case you didn’t already know: The old JesRes is being converted into future housing, and 4E has the details.

Set to open in fall 2015, the Ryan and Mulledy residence hall will have 148 beds in a variety of room styles. Here’s the breakdown by floor:

Screen Shot 2014-11-10 at 1.32.22 PM

The first floor of the building has suites with either four or six beds (more on those below). In addition, there’s a significant chunk of space devoted for both residential and community activities. In fact, where the Jesuit dining hall was located will be a community space for residents. Green space will be added where there’s currently a parking lot. 

Screen Shot 2014-11-10 at 1.13.37 PM

The second floor of the building is composed of suites, which have either eight or four beds, and semi-suites, which have three or four.Screen Shot 2014-11-10 at 1.32.34 PM

The suites have two lofted beds and an enclosed living area. (Side note: there will be a partition between the beds in each loft, because privacy is a thing. ) A four-person suite will have two loft setups and an eight-person suite will have four lofts. For each suite, there’s a kitchenette and general living room. Under each loft is also a bathroom — you can access all of the bathrooms through one interconnected hallway underneath all of the bed spaces. For an eight-person suite, there are two showers and two toilets.

Screen Shot 2014-11-10 at 1.32.45 PM

Some other important things to know about Ryan and Mulledy halls: The building is being brought up to code in terms of handicap accessibility, sprinklers, heat and A/C and various other improvements. Again, this dorm is scheduled to be livable for students starting fall 2015, so for all you current freshmen, sophomores and even juniors — keep an eye out.

Info: masterplanning.georgetown.edu

Photos: georgetown.edu, Alexander Brown/The Hoya

Front Page Fakeout: 3 Years Required But It’ll Be Fun We Promise!

front page fakeoutAn email sent to all students on Friday, April 25, announced the university’s new housing policy mandating three years of on-campus living, beginning with the Class of 2017. This has provoked much outcry from current freshmen, some of whom were intending to live on campus for only one more year but are now required to stay for two. However, a follow-up email sent today from the Office of Student Affairs has added that the university has decided to implement several changes to the residential halls as concessions to be in effect September 2014.

The email announced that several of the walls in various existing dorms will be knocked down, converting those floors into “large open spaces for the students to study.” The email goes on to say, “In accordance with our goal of developing a more residential living and learning undergraduate campus on the Hilltop, we will put plenty of tables in these study areas. Unfortunately, due to current budget constraints, these will likely not be top-of-the-line tables, but instead Ping-Pong tables or those flimsy plastic ones that people put out in their lawns. Additionally, there may not be enough in the budget for chairs, so many students will have to stand.”

When 4E called the Office of Student Affairs for comment, a representative read a prepared official statement: “We here at Georgetown pride ourselves on our emphasis on student space and academic excellence. The conversion of some residential floors into open study spaces is a prime example. Hey DeGioia, would you kiss those cups? Oh excuse me, that’s a not part of the statement.”

When pressed for more information, the representative added that there will be vending machines in place serving all kinds of sodas and juices. She went on to add that, in case one student didn’t have enough money on their GoCard for a “study break drink, we will even have red Solo cups provided so that a fellow student can share theirs. Men and women for others! … No you can’t get a celeb shot, I’m on a roll.”

How to Break Up With Your Roommate

o-BREAKUP-facebookHousing selection is on the horizon! Freshmen everywhere are wondering, “Will I get that Henle/Village A?” (Answer: With that 248 lottery number, keep dreaming.) Upperclassmen are considering whether or not to move off campus. But whether you’re in your first year or your third, you could have one thing in common: You might not want to stay with your current roommate. The problem is: They don’t know it yet.

We here at 4E understand this struggle and have developed a form letter for you to give to your soon-to-be ex-roomie. Just select the proper options and go! Slip it under her pillow! Display it prominently on his desk! Or, you know, tell her in person and be a mature adult.

A Form Letter for Breaking Up With Your Roommate

Hey, [name],

I don’t know about you, but when we met [on CHARMS/ on Facebook/ the first day of school/ in New South that one time/ just kidding we never met], you seemed [super chill/ very compatible/ the most willing to put up with my 3 a.m. drunk crying].

I was really [happy/ ambivalent/ secretly doubtful] when we agreed to be roommates for this year.

When we started hanging out together more during [NSO/ dinner in Leo’s/ just kidding we never hang out], I realized that you were actually kind of [a jerk/ flaky/ literally insane/ I have no idea what your personality is like because we don’t hang out].

And our room. Can we just take a moment to talk about a little thing called [our roommate agreement/ basic hygiene]?

I understand that maybe you’re not used to cleaning up after yourself, but that’s no excuse for [not taking out the garbage/ leaving your week-old sandwich on your desk/ not cleaning up last night’s vomit].

And, okay, maybe you’ve never lived with a roommate before, but that’s still no reason to [blast music at 2 a.m. on a Tuesday/ steal my stuff/ not clean up last night’s vomit].

Now, I know that I’m not perfect. Sorry about that time I [drunkenly ate everything in the fridge/ forgot to wake you up for that class/ said I was a “9” on cleanliness when I’m apparently about a “2”].

How about we just do the right thing and agree to find different roommates for next year? Because I may have already asked someone else …

Sorry [not sorry],
[Your name here]

Photo: huffingtonpost.com 

Housing at a Glance: Summer Living

by Martin Hussey

For the past few Thursdays, 4E has profiled different aspects of the housing process at Georgetown for our freshmen readers who are about to go through the process for the first time. This week, though, we are doing something slightly different.

Just as everyone is researching, interviewing, and applying for summer employment, we also need to find housing (to avoid the awkward and unfortunate possibility of being homeless in D.C. while working at a prestigious law firm, NGO, corporation or government agency).

Fortunately for us, the summer housing process is less complicated than either the academic housing process or the summer internship search process, and there are plenty of avenues that one can find housing on the Hilltop over the summer months. First, find some employment that offers summer housing for free. Work at any campus organization, like the housing office, often comes with the perk of free summer housing.

For those either too busy or too late to find free summer housing though an office on campus, Georgetown’s housing office does offer housing over the summer at on-campus residences. Applications for summer housing will begin February 21 from Georgetown’s summer housing website. A full list of on-campus housing rates over the summer can be found here.

If you don’t feel like living in university housing, there are also plenty of off-campus houses looking for summer sublets. Do a little facebook browsing (people often make events with the location, rent, etc.), or ask some upperclassmen friends. They’ll have a good idea about people looking for subletters and you’ll have the added benefit of living with people you already know.

And for anyone staying over the summer, be aware of non-Georgetown students and groups of high schoolers that flock to the Hilltop over the summer. D.C. is a popular summer destination for many people our age who don’t have the privilege of living here during the school year.

Housing at a Glance: Apartment or Dorm?

by Erin Collins

When housing lottery results arrive, some freshmen will get numbers good enough to get an apartment. Those of you without that option should also know that the waitlist moves quickly with juniors finding out about study abroad, so this choice may very well affect you as well. Coming from the tiny Freshman dorm rooms makes the choice appear easy – who wouldn’t want to upgrade to an apartment? But remember, it is important to weight the pros and cons of dorm and apartment living. So, today’s 4E Housing at a Glance is here to help you make this crucial decision.

Last week we went over the best and worst of housing options for Sophomore year, and this week we have a couple of questions to consider when making your choice between an apartment and another year in the dorms:

Ready to give up dorm life? Moving into an apartment means the end of dorm floors and common rooms. You’ll spend the majority of your time in an apartment with your direct roommates rather than the other people living on your floor in a dorm. However, apartment life likely also means fewer distractions, so you can do more schoolwork at home instead of at Lau.

Private Bathroom? For current Darnall, New South and Harbin residents, it’s likely that nothing seems better than having a private bathroom. Avoiding the frequent hallway walk to the bathroom each day is definitely a welcomed change. Also, this means no more shower caddies or waiting in line for showers. But don’t forget that having a private bathroom means keeping it clean as well as buying bathroom necessities like toilet paper and hand soap that are provided in a dorm. Continue reading “Housing at a Glance: Apartment or Dorm?”

Housing At a Glance: Finding the Perfect Roommate

By Martin Hussey

With freshman housing selection just a few weeks away, it seems like the entire class of 2015 is on pins and needles with roommate drama. The coming weeks will inevitably be filled with jostling for the few remaining apartments in Henle, needless drama between people who may or may not live together and the frightening feeling that all of your friends have found roommates, leaving you all alone.

Yes, for freshmen, the housing selection process for sophomore year is both terrifying and stressful. Dramatic and confusing. Nerve-wracking and miserable. Fortunately for freshmen, 4E is beginning a series of posts, composed by those of us who have survived the process, with advice about how to navigate this stressful difficult process. Today’s post: how to pick your roommate for next year.

Picking roommates for sophomore year is the process that causes the most drama in the housing selection process. Friend groups jostle for who should be placed in which room. Current roommates must choose between living with each other or living with other people. Most of what makes the process of choosing a roommate so difficult is that everyone has a different idea of who they want to live with. And, since freshmen have only known each other for a semester, it’s difficult to know now what your friendship will look like a year from now. After the jump, we include some tips on finding the perfect roommate for next year so that you don’t end up rooming with The Roommate.

Continue reading “Housing At a Glance: Finding the Perfect Roommate”