It’s that time of year again. No, not the time to start getting ready for darties, freaking out about that perfect outfit for spring break or stressing out about midterms. It’s something even more important than that!
It’s the 2017 GUSA election!
Even though it seems like every year the election sneaks up on us, it’s important that we are aware of each campaign’s platform. So in true 4E fashion, we have prepared the perfect drinking game for tonight’s presidential debate.
The presidential debate begins tonight, February 20th, at 7:30 p.m. in the HFSC. Let’s learn more about our candidates and have a libation in our hand at the same time (for 21+ students only). Stay classy and drink responsibly.
Take a small swig…every time a candidate or a question uses the following word(s):
GUSA campaigns. They’re unavoidable. Strangers keep interrupting your “House of Cards” binge (rude!) to tell you about their candidates’ platform. Red Square is lined with gargantuan posters and now your Facebook timeline is incredibly confusing because all of your friends have campaign logos as their profile pics. Hide yo’ kids, hide yo’ wives, but it doesn’t matter because these GUSA campaigns will find you.
As the loyal and hilarious “Top Site” in your web browser, 4E has decided to keep you informed about the GUSA campaigns that have been infiltrating your Georgetown existence for the past few days. But mostly we’re just interested in the same stuff you are, so here are this year’s GUSA campaign videos:
As the unbiased writer of an article called “Six Degrees of Beyoncé,” I believe the song choice was ***Flawless. Zach and Dan had a lot of hip action going on. Like, a LOT. I respect this. They committed and brought out their inner divas. While I can tell that dancing isn’t necessarily their strong suit (again, lots of hip action), they’re not auditioning for “America’s Best Dance Crew” so A+++ for effort. The choreographed dance scenes had a very “We’re All in This Together” vibe to them, and I was about it. This video, combined with the pictures from their website, only further confirms my theory that this campaign is a publicity stunt for a new NBC sitcom called “A Political Bromance: The Zach and Dan Story.” I’d watch it.
Staying in the realm of musical campaign ads, Trevor & Omika want to let us know that they’re “Happy” with a capital “H,” all while giving a nod to the massive hat Pharrell decided to wear to the Grammys. Their platform just makes Georgetown students all over the world want to get up and dance like nobody’s watching, even though the people in the background are totally watching. Their dance moves might just give Zach and Dan a run for their money (just look at their hip action). Instead of a debate or a town hall meeting, it appears a dance-off would be a better use of the public’s time.
Lastly, let’s just talk about “Tromika” for a minute. (Backstory: Trevor + Omika = Tromika). It’s very celebrity couple of them, and as an avid reader of People magazine I support this. First came Brangelina and their football team-sized, jet setting, multicultural family. Then the world plagued us with KimYe (Refer to Kanye West’s “Bound 2” music video for proof). What will Tromika bring us? The answer remains to be seen, but we’re sure it will be something “Happy.”
This video made me believe in love and honest communication. “I remember looking at you, and just seeing you sweat, and hit on every single girl in the program.” So honest and also weirdly endearing. Excellent song choice that reminds me of “The Parent Trap”? Check. Pun based on our outdated, early 2000s AOL designed, roommate-pairing/dating site? Check. Witty banter and phenomenal comedic timing? Check. Thomas and Jimmy have the group dynamic of two policemen in a buddy cop comedic movie a la “The Other Guys” and we can’t wait to see more videos from them!
These guys won’t interrupt your “House of Cards” marathoning. They get it. Short and to the point. They’re no Frank Underwoods (thank goodness!), but they plan to get the job done. Also, in accordance with their video, they’re not unreasonably physically fit, so every Joe and Jane Hoya should feel free to challenge them to an act of physical fitness. Perhaps a dance-off? It’s almost as if this is a reoccurring theme or something.
Now it’s time to vote. Well, it’s time to vote on what’s important: the videos. Which was your favorite? We’d also like to suggest a dance-off. Just be forewarned candidates, 4E will also participate and we will be victorious.