7 Totems of Georgetown

While in the show “You” there are seven totems that mark one’s initiation into Los Angeles life, indeed there are another seven to become a full ~Hoya~. Read below to find out if you have actually reached full membership on the Hilltop.

1. Watch two rats fighting by a trash can in the dead of the night

D.C. is full of fascinating and beautiful fauna, but the rat is undoubtedly held in greatest esteem at Georgetown. If you’re lucky enough to see two of them fighting by a trash can in the dead of the night, preferably by a Henle, you’re more of a Hoya than you’ll ever know.

2. An overflowing toilet

While some may marvel at the charm of Healy and its surrounding tulip beds, I contend that the most pleasant aspect of Georgetown are the facilities — specifically overflowing toilets. Did someone clog it? Is it a simple, common malfunction? Who knows.

3. Cry over an abandoned, half-eaten grilled cheese from Epi

Anyone on the Hilltop will tell you that the proper night out ends with an excursion to Epicurean. Whether you’re merely chilling or ordering food after visiting a sweaty Henle, you and your friends (if lucky) will definitely end up sitting down at a table covered with half-eaten leftovers from your fellow, drunken Hoyas.

4. Have a cockroach in your dorm

If you thought rats were the worst thing to find in your room, guess again. Roaches also carry 33 kinds of bacteria, six different types of parasitic worms and seven known pathogens — just remember that next time one crawls across your desk.

5. Wake up to never-ending construction at 6 a.m.

If you live in Henle or Darnall, you’re all too familiar with the morning not being brought in by the sunrise, but with, well, the sound of a dump truck.

6. See the three-legged dog from SWQ

While you may have thought Jack the Bulldog was the goodest boy on campus, you were wrong. Keep an eye out for the three-legged doggo (named Crouton!) who lives in the Southwest Quad. Extra points if you pet him.

7. Admire the Harry Styles cardboard cutout in Vil A

Keep an eye out for the ominous presence of a Harry Styles cardboard cutout next time you drunkenly wander Vil A in search of a darty. You won’t be disappointed. 

25 Reasons Epi is the New Tombs this Summer

Epi Is New Tombs this summer

A momentous and unruly Georgetown tradition has been forever changed. Well, for the summer, at least. The Tombs has officially closed for renovations and with it many a 21st birthdays, forehead stamps, and traditions suspended until further notice. For many Hoyas, alum, and locals alike, this is an utter tragedy. The night so many have looked forward to, counted down, and dreamed about has been flipped on its head. Left in despair, many of those may be wondering what ever will they do?!

 

EPI!!!!

Here are your 25 reasons Epi is the new Tombs this summer:

1. Quesadillas. ‘Nuf said. 

2. Doctors. They have a tendency to be young, attractive, and scattered around Epi given its close proximity to their place of employment at the hospital.

3. $3.25 pizza. Mhmmm. 

4. The lighting. It’s a bit bright in the main area, but the dark bar provides a nice fun contrast. 

5. The dance floor. What, you didn’t know they had one? Turns out the opening between the two rooms is a great place to break it down. 

6. The diversity. Undergrads, grad students, drunk freshman, hospital staff, and Georgetown staff: it’s really just a great array of community. 

7. The playlist. Epi has jamz! 

 

8. The Darnall geotag. That is all. 

9. The hospital. You should never drink past your limit, but on your 21st, there is an even greater tendency for a person to seek medical attention. For this reason, there’s nothing better than a bar that shares a parking lot with a hospital!

10. Burleith. Two words: close proximity. 

11. Epi mems. You’re sure to have a ton. Why not add to the archival of weird Epi happenings thus far?

12. Drunk underclassman. They’re great to watch, truly. 

13. Free water. >>>>>.

 

14. Exclusive bar. Feel special in your own 21+ room while your underage friends stay close by.

15. Tombs is closed. NEXT! 

16. Epi has milkshakes.

17. And condiments. A vast and endless selection of condiments. 

18. Those round tables. Nothing says party like a circular table where you can sit and view all of your friends, and the other room only has rectangular tables. 

19. Underage friends. No longer must they mourn your departure at the door, but they can be at hand to help you walk and take part in your debauchery (well, from afar). 

20. Sushi bar. 

21. Henle. Proximity, proximity, proximity. 

22. Epi aesthetic. It’s just one of a kind. 

23. People watching. More of the above. 

24. You can customize your grilled cheese sandwich.

25. Epi rocks. Let’s be honest: It’s up there with The Tombs. Well, at least in the opinion of an underage person who has never been.

Alas, there’s just one small catch….

 

Epi closes at 10:30 during the summer. Didn’t we almost have it all?

Gifs: giphy.com, https://www.thehoya.com