Georgetown, Please Offer Better Electives

Finals season may be upon us, but our fall classes are right around the corner, and hopefully, next semester won’t be over Zoom! While Georgetown students have just registered, it’s clear there needs to be a revision of the schedule of classes.

“United States Political Systems?” “Problem of God?” Boring.

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Georgetown clearly needs to spice up its academic roster, and we at the 4E have some suggestions for new classes that are sure to make students cry on registration day when they realize that there are no spots left.

Me, when the entry-level history course I need to take to graduate on time filled up because all of the spaces are reserved for first-years.
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THEO 666: Cats and Satanism

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The Blue and Gray Tour Guide Society has been complaining that “Dogs and Theology” — which is a real class that I took in fall 2019, shoutout to Father Steck — has not been a compelling enough draw to get prospective students to attend Georgetown. The administration should respond to this with another whammy of a theology-requirement-fulfilling class, by offering the exact opposite. What could be more enticing than a class on Satanism and cats offered by a Jesuit school with a dog mascot? It’s perfect!

MARK 019: Rebranding After a Deadly Pandemic Takes Your Company’s Name

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The unprecedented events of the last year led to one unexpected consequence: a fall in the sale and halted production of Corona beer. How can a company bounce back from such a disastrous naming coincidence? Only the MSBros can find the true answer in this tantalizing class.

INAF 101: Devil’s Advocacy

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This class would be perfect for carefully cultivating Georgetown’s next generation of “Devil’s Advocates!” You know the type: a Pocket Constitution always on hand, always saying that “both sides are to blame,” and always on the lookout for their newest ~victim~ to engage in an unwilling debate.

BIOL 069: The Jesuit Identity and Your Body

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This class, cross-referenced with theology, will explore the relationship between Georgetown’s Jesuit Values and your ~body~ (think: “the birds and the bees,” but if taught by Father Carnes)! With course modules featuring “Hoya No Sex-a” and “How to Use Bathroom Doors as a Propaganda Tool,” this class is sure to hit the perfect balance of scandal and intrigue.

CHEM 411: Mixology

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What could be more scientific than experimenting with delicious drink combinations? This upper-level chemistry elective would be perfect for fulfilling Georgetown’s Science for All core requirement and for ensuring that the Village A rooftop has more to offer (21+) Hoyas than lukewarm Natty Lite. Plus, if your career in consulting doesn’t work out, this class would give a great backup plan for graduation!

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Hopefully this refresh on Georgetown’s course offerings will make our undergraduate population much happier! Keep that GPA up, Hoyas!

Header Image: GEORGETOWN UNIVERSITY

The Closing Address

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I remember the exact day that I became Deputy Blog Editor and began my climb up the 4E ladder of power. I was sitting in a random hostel in Tel Aviv, Israel, on a trip with a subset of my abroad friends. It felt like a dream to me, both because I had just achieved one of my goals and because I was in ISRAEL (Read: wut). Anyway, I know for many this does not seem #lifechanging, but for me it was (cue emotions). Over the past two years, 4E and the bloggers have given me so much. It has defined so much of my Georgetown career, and for that I couldn’t be more grateful.

However, the time has come for me to give up my power and become an actual wash up. It is scary leaving something you love. But graduation is coming (even though I am trying to fight it) and it has come time to accept that the end of Georgetown is near.

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While this won’t be my last 4E post — because I am not ready for that yet — I am writing this to close the chapter of my dictatorship editorship. And, what better way to do this than by reminiscing on my favorite posts (of the 124 I have written) from the past two years.

From my heart to yours:

  • The End of the Beginning– “Oh, and when you are finally at your study abroad destination complaining about ‘how weak your internet connection is,’ just think about your favorite blogger (a.k.a. me) trying to stream videos in Turkey. God help me.”
  • 4-eign E: All About that Mosque– “Other than the untimely alarms, Turkish society is pretty normal. In Alanya, there are TWO Starbucks (and yes, they do serve iced coffee), local shops, a beach and a million and a half tourists.”
  • Campus Confusions: Post-Study Abroad– “My friends and I have realized that we have missed out on some key phrases that have been added to this beautiful language of ours. Excuse me, but what is ‘on fleek?’ Is that like a compliment? So beyond confused.”

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  • The Five Times when You Know You are a Senior– “The youth has been deprived. I explained the saga of going to Tuscany’s yesterday and actually got emotional. Who doesn’t miss the curb sing-a-longs? Or, wait, was that just me?”
  • Friday Fixat10ns: Freshman Year Throwbacks– “Let me set the scene: The year was 2012, fall to be exact. The place? Georgetown. Obama hadn’t been re-elected. Libya and Syria were all over the news. Gay marriage was not illegal nation-wide. Kim Kardashian and Kris were still technically married. And these songs were the hits of the time….”

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  • Finals Fashion: A Guide to Dressing Down– “This is me. I am leggings…There are many different ways to pull of this innovative look. Pair them with a t-shirt for a relaxed, ‘I might work out today’ look. The athletic, dressed down combo is sure to make people think that you might be fit and actually do something with your life. Or you can do what I usually do and pair your leggings with a sweater. The best part about this look is that people often will think you are put together. Joke’s on them.”
  • 5 Reasons Georgetown Students are Really Olivia Pope– “You’re awesome at delegating work and watching it all come together. Georgetown students work hard (and we Netflix even harder). Hoyas all possess the natural skill to command and demand attention. Come on, all of us have at least once delegated tasks and reaped the rewards. Life is a battlefield.”

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  • What flavor of Burnett’s are you?– “Sweeter than Whipped Cream, you are Sugar Cookie Burnett’s! This flavor should be illegal because it does not even seem like alcohol. You are perfect for fun night out, but not always for a crazy one! Maybe as the evening goes on…?”
  • Snapchat Updates Again: Emojis– “Fire- This emoji is the compliment to end all compliments. You guys are on a snapchat streak! Either you are besties missing each other or you are both too obnoxious on social media. Nonetheless, you have been snappin’ back and forth for the number of consecutive days indicated. Congrats!”

Honestly, I could list all my posts here. I have had such a blast being part of this amazing publication. Also, I’ll miss you all. Even those who rarely read my posts. Just having the opportunity to bring my thoughts to the world has been a gift to me. Don’t miss me too much.

Signing off from the Lau 3 reading room, forever 4E editor Coco.

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Photos/Gifs: bustle.com; theodysseyonline.com; buzzfeed.com; https://adnan.nyc/;  giphy.com; tumblr.com; manrepeller.com