Who Goes to What Corp Location

There’s nothing Georgetown students love to hate more than The Corp. Yet sometimes, when Leo’s just doesn’t cut it, even the most anti-establishment SFSers will succumb to their consumerist urges and support the capitalist temptress that is The Corp — those apple cinnamon muffins are just too good. But there are some of us whose Flex Dollar accounts seemingly runneth over and, thus, frequent Corp storefronts more than others. To anyone still stinging from their freshman fall Corp rejection, this one’s for you.

Hilltoss

Hilltoss — the bougie student’s Crop Chop and the lazy student’s Sweetgreen. While some of us may balk at the prices — $12 for a salad the size of my palm?— the cost is no problem for your international friend whose parents are either diplomats or “international businessmen” (aka CIA operatives). This Moncler-sporting expat summers in the south of France, skis in the winters at their chalet in Switzerland and is way overdressed for your 9 a.m. “Problem of God” class. They like Hilltoss because it’s sooo much less processed than the rest of the food in the United States; after their refreshing, organic salad they are known to enjoy a cigarette break outside the HFSC.

This ~citizen of the world~ can find kinship in the laptop-sticker-loving social justice warrior waiting behind them in line. Likely a JUPS or WGST major, this person hails from Long Island or a wealthy Jersey suburb, probably spells their name weirdly — you’re not fooling anyone, Maddisynne — and used to love infinity signs and WeHeartIt but now has deleted all social media so they can be more “in touch with nature.” Though the rest of us may term them “granola,” they prefer to be called “sustainable” or “ecological.”

Uncommon Grounds

This artsy coffee snob was definitely deciding between Wesleyan, NYU, and Georgetown. They have a Crosley record player and listen exclusively to the Velvet Underground and Nirvana. UG is the perfect place for them to drink some ~real~ coffee while journaling or writing poetry in their Moleskine. Something about the album cover wall art and deliberately disheveled decor really gets their creative juices flowing and the “accidental” coffee rings on their papers make them feel authentic.

MUG

This ICC holy grail serves students of all kinds, from all backgrounds and in all schools, but there is one they serve the most — the over-caffeinated SFSer who just has SO MANY core requirements, three State Department internships at once, is learning their fifth language and really wants you to know they’re in the SFS and that their workload is harder than yours. One of the few breeds on campus able to navigate the labyrinth of the ICC, this student can often be seen running from “Map of the Modern World” to Arabic with a Corp coffee cup in hand. The best course of action is to get out of their way and get them their coffee as fast as possible — they’re in the SFS after all, so they need it more than you.

Hoya Snaxa

Most people who enter this glorified broom cupboard are under some sort of influence, be it exhaustion, alcohol or some other ~controlled~ substance. It takes a lot for someone to willingly shove themselves into a closet stuffed to the brim with likely expired drugstore candy and very few do so completely sober. The typical Snaxa-goer is a Southwest Quad sophomore looking for a lighter and some Cheetos to aid in their cannabis-related endeavors. They probably are in Ultimate Frisbee and are majoring in Econ or OPIM. This classic Hoya bro is definitely sporting head-to-toe Georgetown athletic gear despite not having been on a sports team since 10th grade — unless FIFA counts.

Midnight Mug

This person is that friend who never goes to lecture, writes papers drunk and still manages to make the Dean’s List. Whatever they lack in work ethic they make up for with determination, nerve and coffee. This highly caffeinated Hoya is an avid Redditor, with a taste in memes you don’t understand and a passion for conspiracy theories like, “Jack the Bulldog is actually a robotic surveillance device deployed by the Soviets during the Cold War, and that’s why you can never pet him.”  You can find this person on Lau 2 at 11 p.m. the night before an essay they haven’t started is due, watching “Illuminati Confirmed” videos.

Vital Vittles

Nearly everyone goes to Vittles, but none more so than the sleep-deprived MSBro — or, I’m told, people getting ready to throw a Henle rager. Desperately in need of some Nutella or Red Bull to patch their life back together after scrolling through Facebook videos instead of studying for three hours, what this person really needs is a hug. Yet, all they get is a giant pack of oddly flavored potato chips they didn’t want because Vittles was out of what they really wanted.

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, thecorp.org

You Are What You Eat: What Your Georgetown Dining Preference Says About You

Let’s be honest: Georgetown isn’t exactly known for its food. (Fun fact: Niche.com ranked us 1,017 out of 1,384  schools in its 2017 rankings for the “Best College Food in America”).

Nevertheless, with the renovation of an upper level of Leo’s that only flooded once this year and the addition of Chick-fil-A, we shouldn’t be complaining too much. And with all these new eateries come new types of people. Here are all of the different types of hungry Hoyas you’ll see throughout the Hilltop.

5 Spice

Probably an ex-boarding school student, this person is a veteran of Chinese takeout, constantly ordering the chicken fried rice, egg rolls and fried pork dumplings. Perhaps 5 Spice isn’t as luxurious as Shanghai Lounge, but with limited flex dollars you gotta ball on a budget with those meal swipes and make the most of it. You’ll probably never see this person actually eating in Leo’s — they’re most likely munching away at their sesame chicken while playing League of Legends or watching the basketball game on their laptop.

Sazón

One of the most annoying eaters, a Sazón lover is that person screaming when “Despacito” comes on in a sweaty Henle. This person probably studied abroad and applied to live in a Spanish LLC after getting an A- in Intermediate II. Oh, and did they mention they studied abroad? The yellow rice from Sazón must have cultured them and ingrained both some ~diversity~ and ~perspective~.

Bodega

This one’s a joke. Does anyone even eat here? Although I’ve never seen a line here, I imagine a Bodega lover is the type of person you’d see on a Georgetown brochure — organized, studious, disciplined and never puking off a Vil A rooftop on Georgetown Day.

Olive Branch

Found in a Moncler coat and some hipster glasses, the standard Olive Branch customer is either a faux Italian or an expat who believes  a ham, feta and spinach pizza really reflects their ~international status~. You’ll often find this person hanging out with the same three people every single day. Catch them at Sax or some bourgeois club away from us plebeians who don’t have cool accents.

Downstairs Leo’s

You should always eat with this person, as they probably have zero standards for food and therefore will never complain about your cooking. The typical Downstairs Leo’s customer has both a large heart and stomach and probably complains about the small portion sizes at 5 Spice while defending the integrity of Georgetown mice — “They’re not even that bad.” These people are the least uptight and most carefree people you’ll  meet in your life — a nice change of pace from the SFS kid who reminds you of his internship every day in class or that one freshman who claims she needs to live in a Henle or Vil B next year.

Crop Chop

“Did I tell you I don’t eat complex carbs?” A regular Crop Chop fanatic will often be found ordering a kale salad inundated with a sour vinaigrette dressing. You can often spot Crop Chop lovers in Lululemon leggings on the way to Yates. If they don’t remind you  they’re vegan or complain that “greasy” upstairs Leo’s promotes college obesity and unhealthy living,  consider yourself lucky.

Royal Jacket

You should envy this person. How does someone have so much time to wait 30 minutes in line for a turkey and cheese sandwich? God forbid this person be found in Lau. Lauinger? Never heard of her. You’ll only spot them in the bourgeois resorts of Regents or working arduously in the MSB.

And of course, we mustn’t forget the majority of Hoyas who will be found drunkenly ordering Insomnia Cookies or Wingos in the late hours of the weekend. Good luck on your exams and happy eating!

Sources: niche.com, giphy.com

Overheard At Epi

After having a ~fun~ night filled with about seven too many shots of lime Burnett’s, we all somehow inevitably end up at Epi. At this point, it’s a Georgetown tradition to drunkenly eat way more chicken quesadillas than our stomachs can possibly hold. Of course, though, while enjoying the food and ambiance of Epicurean, we are also bound to eavesdrop overhear some rather interesting conversations:

The Drunken Breakups

I’ve witnessed an abnormal amount of drunken breakups occur at Epi in my first year. The first one takes the prize for being the most entertaining to watch…

(I know, I know. I’m a horrible person sometimes, but aren’t we all?)

I remember sitting down in an Epi booth  my first weekend at Georgetown and hearing, “BUT I STILL LOVE YOU.”  Five seconds into the conversation, I was seriously invested. I did what anyone would do: I casually looked over. Picture it: A blatantly sober girl near tears and a blatantly drunk boy staring at his phone.

The awkward tension — filled with silent pauses, quiet sniffles and violently fast texting noises — was finally brought to an end when the girl slammed her hands down on the table and screamed, “JUST LOOK AT ME AND TALK TO ME.”

By this point, the horrible part of me was quite invested as I tried to sneakily watch this intense showdown while scarfing down my quesadilla. It was as though a staged and poorly-acted reality TV show was unfolding before me — truly the best late night entertainment.

But that’s not all. Perhaps the best — or worst, depending on how good of a human being you are — part was when the guy suddenly looked up at his supposed girlfriend, held his phone out and asked: “Hey, isn’t this girl hot?”

He paused to glance around as if he knew he had gathered an audience by this point and said, “We should probably end things now.”

All I can say is RIP to that relationship.

 Fork Theft 

Unless you brought your own silverware to college and never have to worry about being out of forks, knives and spoons, you’ve probably suffered while trying to eat a midnight snack.

Often, I find myself laying in bed, watching “That 70’s Show,” too lazy to make my way over to Leo’s. So, naturally, I make myself some Easy Mac, only to realize I am forkless.

More often than I’d like to admit, I wander into Epi in the late hours of the night, making my way over to the silverware section while waiting for food. Naturally, I ask myself what any sane and reasonable person would ask at 1 a.m.: “How many forks should I steal?”

I’m not alone. Just last week, I heard another girl ask her friend that question. The girl then proceeded to grab a fistful of forks and carelessly stuff them in the pockets of her jeans. Stay classy, Georgetown.

“Hey, can I have a bite of that?” 

I’d like to think all of us are giving, caring people who would help out a friend in need. Unfortunately, my giving, caring soul suddenly turns into an evil teenage girl when my food is at stake.

Imagine this: A girl sits down in a drunken stupor, happily gazing at a perfect grilled cheese. She picks it up, about to take the most satisfying bite when her friend taps her shoulder, his face moving close to her food while saying, “Hey, can I have a bite of that?”

Then without waiting for a proper response, he takes a gigantic bite out of her sandwich. That was probably the first time my heart actually broke. I’ve never felt so bad for another person.

Final Thoughts

I think we can come to the general consensus that the most profound, enlightening and insightful of conversations occur at Epi in the wee hours of the morning. And remember, if you want to steal all the plastic forks and spoons, bring a bag.

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, thehoya.com

A Guide To Scamming the Most Out of Free Food This GAAP Weekend

Welcome to Georgetown, new Hoyas! Your friends at 4E are so excited to meet you next year! Before you  arrive, hopefully you’re going to GAAP Weekend so you can celebrate and learn more about us, regular ole Hoyas. If you are, here’s how to scam the most out of free food this GAAP Weekend.

8:30 AM on Friday – Go to St. Mary’s for breakfast. They without a doubt have the best spread. From fresh fruit to small pieces of banana bread, the NHS (School of Nursing and Health Studies for the newbies) has too much food and not enough people to share it with.

1:45 PM on Friday – For those who want to be extra ~cultured~ be sure to hit up the SFS for some Qdoba. However, if you’re not about that, then go to the MSB. If you have to venture into ~The Snake Den~ for anything, it might as well be good food from a fancy restaurant.

6:00 PM on Friday – Starving after Convocation and can’t wait the 30 minutes it will probably take to walk to Tombs and get food? Walk for 1 minute instead from Healy to the ICC for the Multicultural Reception! It might will definitely be the best food you’ve had all day!

9:00 AM on Saturday – You could go to Leo’s for breakfast, and it will probably  definitely be the best Leo’s you’ll have in your Georgetown career, or you could knock on an unsuspecting upperclassmen’s Vil A door and beg food from them. No doubt they’ll take pity on you and attempt to give you something better (choose the door wisely).

12:00 PM on Saturday – Want free food AND clothing? Come to Red Square so that clubs can inevitably try to bribe you to join once you get here! The free swag and food ranging from Hershey’s Kisses to slices of pizza will be worth it. I promise.

Your friends at 4E sincerely hope that this list has helped you to scam the most food out of your GAAP Weekend and make it one you’ll never forget!

Gifs: giphy.com

9 Reasons Why We Love The Farmers Market

Banner - FarmersAh, Wednesdays. It’s a special type of day… not only because we’ve gotten through half of the week, but also because our generous university has gifted us with the deliciousness that is the Farmers Market. Here are nine reasons we are in love with it – is your favorite on the list?

  1. That Incredible Pizza

The Timber Pizza Company hits it out the park every time. You can get an amazing wood-fired pizza that’s classic cheese, pepperoni or veggie/pesto-style. Any way you order it, the pizza is so fresh and delicious that no one would judge you if you got right back in line for another.

2. It’s Not From Leo’s
Let’s face it, you need to avoid it at all costs a break once in a while.

3. Churros. Stuffed. With. Nutella.
Quite honestly, there’s little to nothing I would rather have right now. The name says it all.

4. Rita’s To-Die-For Crepes

They start out with the perfect crepe, and from there you can go savory or sweet – or both!

5. The Dumplings
Pinch’s handmade Chinese dumplings will never let you down. As my official go-to farmers market meal, I highly recommend these little pockets of perfection.

6. Melties

The combination of warm cookies and ice cream will make you want to cry the happiest tears of joy.

7. Swizzler’s ~Gourmet~ Hot Dogs
I said gourmet, right? I’ll bet you haven’t had a hot dog this fancy in your life. So do yourself a favor and treat yo’ self.

8. The Ambiance
You gotta love the happy, heart-warming atmosphere on Copley Lawn every Wednesday. Break out that picnic blanket, grab some friends and get out there!

9. You’re Slowly Becoming More Of An Adult

What? Is that you buying fruit and bread for breakfast, carrying around grocery bags, and providing for yourself? Props to you, you fully functioning adult!

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, gufarmersmarket.org

A Guide to Bagels in D.C.

bagels_video_m22_2015_any_

Note: I may or may not have been eating a bagel while writing this.

After living in D.C. for the past 3 years, I have become known to some (read: no one) as the bagel connoisseur of the District. I take my bagels very seriously, as any respectable person should. Primarily, this is because I am a New Yorker and bagels are a religion. Mostly, it’s because bagels are amazing and #worththepraise.

giphy-1

As you probably hopefully know, bagels in D.C. basically s-u-c-k. I don’t understand it. There must really be something in the New York water. However, over the last 3 years, I have determined the best bagels in the D.C. area. While they are nothing like the New York bagels, they are worth the try.

Ranked from worst to best bagels:

5. Einstein Brothers Bagels: Their only redeeming qualities is their location proximity and the fact that you can use your swipes. Otherwise, the bagels are the definition of sub-par. I have a theory, the more weird bagel type options there are, the worse the bagel quality. Still waiting on that being tested.

Ranking: Not worth it. But, if I was starving in the middle of midterms, maybe.

13914
No comment.

4. Corp Bagels/Saxby’s Bagels: These are a little better, but not much. For some reason, they are infinitely better when toasted, go figure. Totally worth it, especially when you are trapped in Lau for the 10th hour straight. But don’t get crazy with the flavors. No one likes the pretentious bagel orderer.

Ranking: A for sure for a Lau lockdown, but otherwise you could do better. 

parks-no-bagel

3. Bagels Etc.: Located at 2122 P Street NW in Dupont, Bagels Etc. is on point. Fair warning: they only take cash. Nonetheless, this place is great and really understands the bagel to cream cheese ratio. Thank God, someone who gets it.

Ranking: If you are in Dupont, this place is worth it. Wouldn’t travel across the city for it though. That’s why we have Postmates, duh.

5b5f2610-3429-0131-3a51-46ffe533d358

2. Bethesda Bagels: Located in Dupont and Bethesda, this place is on point. This place has everything: cream cheese, a loud atmosphere and fabulous egg sandwiches. They are also on Postmates, but watch the delivery fee. A New Yorker’s paradise.

Ranking: A diamond in the rough. Thank god for some semblance of a New York bagel. 

o
Hot damn.

1. GW Deli: THE HOLY GRAIL (of Foggy Bottom). I love this place, it is my favorite restaurant in the District. They are closed on Sundays though, fair warning. If you don’t order an egg, swiss, bacon and avocado sandwich on a whole wheat everything bagel, you are doing it wrong.

Ranking: If I could go here everyday, I would. They must ship their bagels in from Midtown. Obsessed, obsessed, obsessed.

Do it for the 'gram. And the nomz.
Do it for the ‘gram. And the nomz.

tumblr_n6qdl7hQbr1tam8kco1_500

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com; tumblr.com; easyvegan.info; https://animalnewyork.com/; bustle.com; lasvegas.net; yelp.com

Ben and Jerry’s Pot-Infused Ice Cream

bob-marley_03

We all knew that Ben and Jerry had some hippie habits with their introduction of ice cream flavors such as Half-baked, Phish Food and Jamaican Me Crazy. But now the duo are ready to take it to the next level: they are proposing a pot-infused ice cream flavor! With marijuana being legalized in several states such as Colorado, Washington, Alaska and now DC, the two are quoted saying “makes sense to me, combine your pleasures”. Considering that in the last year Colorado sold over 5 million edibles, Ben and Jerry could be on to something. And have they let us down before?

Here are some possible names for this proposed ice cream….

Super-Baked: This ice cream flavor is similar to half-baked except for the fact that swirled in with those cookie dough chunks is a sprinkle of cannabis… or maybe more that a sprinkle.

Is This Love: In honor of the dread wearing, free lovin’ Jamaican legend Bob Marley, this flavor takes on a more tropical feel. You’ll be able to be free of worry as you taste this mango and pineapple combo… and a little marijuana.

Two Birds, One Stone(d):  As Ben Cohen stated earlier why not “combine two pleasures”? This Nutella, caramel and weed infused ice cream may do the trick.

Cannabiscotti and Cream: Sorry to say I did not come up with this name myself, but it sounds pretty clever to me. This flavor would have a more sophisticated flare with biscotti chunks and a rich butterscotch after taste.

Chunky Monkey Munchies: A play on an already existing Ben and Jerry’s flavor, Chunky Monkey, this ice cream with chocolate chunks and walnuts may leave you feeling hungrier. Lucky for you, this isn’t your first rodeo and you are prepared with another pint of ice cream.

Blaze of Glory: For all of those chocolate lovers out there, this is the flavor for you. It’s creamy chocolate ice cream infused with “special” brownies will leave you feeling delightful.

Though Ben and Jerry consider this idea to be genius, it is not up to them if production can actually begin.  So, it may be a while until we actually see this ice cream in stores.

Sources: Time Magazine “Ben & Jerry’s Founders Think Pot Ice Cream Makes Sense”

Photos/Gifs: Tumblr.com,  benjerry.co.uk

Girl Scout Cookies: Ice Cream Sandwiches

girlscout-cookies

Midterms are upon us. 4E knows that, believe us. There is so much stress and emotions surrounding this time period, most people crack under the pressure. But, this doesn’t have to be the case. Nothing says “who cares about that grade?” like delicious food.

A few weeks ago Jimmy Fallon and Ben & Jerry’s brought us “The Tonight Dough”, AKA a revolutionary type of ice cream that basically makes you wanna cry.

8JVjMCr3OIAhO

Now, things are getting even better in the ice cream world. It is like the heavens have answered our prayers.

We all love Girl Scout cookies with a burning passion. Well, the Girl Scouts are expanding their market and they are now selling Thin Mint ice cream sandwiches!

girlscoutcream-500x291c

WHAT? HOW? WHEN? These were all the questions racing through my mind when I found out.

According to the Consumerist, a 6-pack of these amazing treats costs $3.50 at Shop-Rite or Target.

How cheap! How affordable! How broke I am going to be!

tumblr_inline_mjotweQfi11qz4rgp

So, somebody please go out to the nearest Target/Shop-Rite and report back to me on how #amazing and life changing these are. Hopefully they make other flavors soon!

Say hello to the future of snacking!

Photos/Gifs: https://hellogiggles.com/girl-scout-cookie-ice-cream; https://consumerist.com/2015/02/25/new-products-girl-scout-cookie-ice-cream-bars-taco-bell-sauce-packet-chips/; tumblr.com; coetail.com

Gather Around the Table: Georgetown Food Clubs

breakfastmain-copy

Few things bring people together quite like a good meal. Georgetown is a prime example of this. Leo’s is filled with groups of friends trying to enjoy whatever happens to be served up that day, or suffering together waiting in long lines.

However, recently more focused groups have risen on campus. We have always had GUGS, but now clubs like GUAC (Georgetown University Avocado Club) and Pi Zeta Alpha: The Pizza Fraternity are getting started. This has led to a simple question, what’s next?

Here are a few more food clubs that would suit Georgetown well:

food animated GIF

Food Truck Chasers – One of the benefits of living in a city like D.C. is the interesting array of food trucks that are scattered around the city. Georgetown students’ only experience with food trucks shouldn’t be just the one that parks in Healy Circle on late night weekends. Many food trucks serve extremely good food, and there is such a variety that it is worth trying to experience as many of them as you can. A personal favorite is the Swizzler truck. Swizzler serves gourmet hot dogs, with a variety of toppings that will satisfy anyone’s taste. Swizzler is normally right outside the front gates on Fridays, so its a convenient, natural, and tasty place to start. Check them out on Twitter (@swizzlerfoods) for their complete schedule. If you like them, expand and try the other trucks D.C. has to offer. You can find things from tacos, to gyros, to pizza. Find something you like and chase them down because they are always on the move. The website “Food Truck Fiesta” has an active map of where the trucks are, and can be found here.

See-Food: The Seafood Club – Georgetown is located within close proximity to both the Chesapeake Bay and the Atlantic Ocean leading to a city that offers a variety of fresh seafood. Fresh seafood is hard to come by most places, and we should take advantage of the fact we have such quality seafood in our neighborhood. The best part of the seafood club is that you have so many options. One trip could be for a casual, cheap lunch at a place like Tackle Box which is right on M St. (unfortunately closed for renovations right now, but highly reccomend when it opens back up). A week later, the club could head over to the Washington Harbour and get all dressed up and get a nice seafood dinner at a place like Farmers Fishers Bakers. However, there are so many other great seafood options around D.C. that need to be explored.

Brunch Bunch – It seems that a nice Saturday morning brunch is a fan favorite here at Georgetown. There are a ton of places both in Georgetown and across D.C. that offer an exceptional brunch. Brunch prices are often very different depending on what the restaurant offers, but you will be always be able to find one that caters to your budget and wants. One spot close to campus with an especially tasty brunch is Fiola Mare. For $28, you get a choice of beverage, an appetizer, entree, and dessert. An extremely good deal that can be found down on the waterfront at 3050 K St. Many restaurants advertise their brunches on the chalkboard stand-up signs outside their front doors, so keep an eye out next time you are walking down Wisconsin or M, because you just may find something that catches your eye.

Fly With Us: Wings – Chicken wings are a personal favorite of mine, and rarely do you find someone who does not enjoy a good plate of wings. They go perfect with sporting events and good friends. Every restaurant has their own spin on wings, and especially the sauces. Often times it’s the sauces that really distinguish one wing from another. Many places offer what they claim to be the “hottest” wings, as well as many establishments offering deals like all you can eat wings for a flat price. This makes wings perfect for a club looking to try all the different takes on a classic staple. A place I recommend to begin with is First Down Sports Bar in nearby Ballston, Virginia. It is a short cab or metro ride away. They offer 40 flavors of sauce, as well as having 28 TVs in the restaurant, making it a perfect place to go watch a game with some friends. On Monday’s they offer 59 cent wings, and Wednesday’s it is all you can eat wings for $18. We’ve all tried Wingos, but there are so many other places around D.C. that offer great wings, so get a group together and go see who can handle the hottest wings.

Eating History – One of the coolest parts about being in D.C. is constantly being surrounded by history. We are within walking distance of the National Mall, White House and so many other historical landmarks. With that said, all the leaders of our nation had to eat somewhere, right? Get together, pick your favorite person in our nation’s history and find out where they liked to eat. Restaurants love to advertise their historical connections so it won’t be hard to find. An easy and classic place to start is Martin’s Tavern, right at the corner of Wisconsin and N. There JFK proposed to Jackie, and presidents ranging from Truman to George W. Bush have enjoyed a meal there. Places all across D.C. will offer you a great meal and a taste of history, so get a group together and try it out.

These are just a few ideas for potential future food clubs that would be successful here on campus. Although, they don’t need to be a school sanctioned club to be enjoyed. If you and your friends enjoy a similar taste in something, get off campus and try what D.C. has to offer to you. There is too much good food in this city that is going uneaten.

Photos/Gifs: thenypost.files.wordpress.com, tumblr.com

Introducing Starbuck’s New Tiramisu Lattee

starbuckslatte

For all the Starbucks lovers out there, I have good news! There is a new signature latte joining the fold, the Tiramisu latte!

Why go out and buy overly priced deserts at a restaurant when you can consume them in liquid form at Starbucks?

On a healthier note, Starbucks is bringing in a coconut milk option by popular demand. Allergic to dairy and soy? Never fear coconut is here.

Although I applaud these new changes, I can’t help wondering, why stop there? So many delicious desserts are just waiting to be turned into lattes. Here are just a few suggestions for you, Starbucks.

1. Carrot Cake Latte. I mean, it’s essentially the same as the PSL but with carrot, am I right? I think this orange, foamy drink would be especially delicious.

2. Key Lime Pie Latte. St. Patty’s day is right around the corner, what could be more festive?

green lattee
A latte Shrek would approve of

3. Glazed Donut Latte. Buy this and an actual donut, dip and enjoy.

4. Chocolate Gelato Latte. Just got back from Study Abroad or just really like chocolate? Starbucks, if you could melt some gelato and pour in milk that would be a latte right?

5. Thin Mint Latte. This is needed because it’s more socially acceptable than walking around and shoving an entire box of Girl Scout cookies in my mouth.

girl scout

So there you have it, a plethora of new latte ideas courtesy of the 4E. Although I doubt you’ll be seeing any of these flavors in a Starbucks near you, it’s probably better not to add to the already extensive list of dessert lattes.

We’ve already got the caramel brulee, caramel flan, cinnamon dolce, pumpkin spice, chestnut praline, Christmas cookie, eggnog, gingerbread, toffee nut and the new tiramisu latte*. So go forth and latte.

*Consuming more than 4,000 calories per day in liquid latte form is probably bad for you. Please drink responsibly.

Photos: ryot.org; trbimg.com