Cries for Help: Carvings in Lau Cubicles

As a nearly 230-year-old institution, Georgetown is host to secrets that current students can hardly fathom.

Hopefully no basilisks tho 🐍 #snakesofgeorgetown

Some of these secrets date back to the school’s founding. Messages etched by early students into the stone walls of Healy, White-Gravenor and Dahlgren — “Thou art fairer than a principled Jesuit,” “Thy perfume sweetens the scent of the stankiest Leo’s dish return,” etc. — have faded over time.

Actual footage of the Healy clock ringing every 15 minutes.

However, contemporary graffiti is alive and well in some of the newer and more utilized buildings on campus. Most anonymous messages, in fact, are located in none other than Lauinger Library, a hotspot of ~brutal~ nervous breakdowns on campus.

Lauinger? I barely know her.

Please join me as I reveal the most honest and repulsive thoughts of Georgetown students: those scrawled on the inside of Lau cubicles and Walsh restrooms in desperate acts of self-expression.

Me as I plumb Lau’s dusty depths. Also, if you don’t know what movie this gif is from, I can’t be friends with you.

Georgetown Confessions

It’s amazing that the president found time to helicopter over to Georgetown and vandalize our library! Spelling errors aside, this is 100% a rule to live by. #FightAgainstTheCapitalistCorp

This was found covering approximately 4 feet of vertical space on the lower level of Lau. I mean … say it loud, say it proud??? 😳🤷🏻‍♀️

Breaking down gender barriers one act of vandalism at a time.

You’ve got to admit, coming out and claiming the Walsh fourth floor women’s bathroom as one of your favorite spots on campus is a bold move. Kudos to this brave soul.

Slackademia

This one is honestly too relevant right now. I love how this ~poet~ backed up some linguistics major’s revelation with a quintessentially Georgetown story of academic humiliation.

4E was tipped off that this one was drawn by a struggling freshman who started their “Problem of God” paper the night before it was due and realized that they were supposed to “conduct a survey.” Yikes.

Quarter-Life Crises

If Lana Del Rey went to Georgetown, these would be the lyrics to her No. 1 song. FYI, if unlike this songwriter, the middle stall in the Walsh third floor bathroom isn’t really your vibe, check out these other spots on campus where you can bawl your eyes out.

This picture illustrates what happens when SFSers get too into their Neo-Sovietism class and then realize that they have to make themselves marketable to consulting firms for summer internships.

Classic Georgetown Elitism

Okay, Brock, that’s only because your dad donated a swimming pool there! Get off your high horse, please.

I mean… George Washington probably would have been a Hoya. #justsayin

Hoyas Reveal Their Ugly Side

This statement is unacceptable. Georgetown students are practically defined by their constant belittlement of campus dining and love for mainstream hip-hop. Do better, Hoyas.

Now that you’ve seen some of the innermost thoughts of Georgetown students, I encourage you to look around the next time you’re struggling to write a paper in Lau at 2 a.m. You may find inspiring messages, crude drawings or desperate cries for help.

Either way, the notes left behind by past Hoyas are an important part of Georgetown’s history that current students can and should bond over.

Did you know that Ben Gates holds a degree in American history from Georgetown? #NotableAlum

Best of luck with finals, everyone! Keep scribblin’ away.

Note: I’d like to apologize to all of the people I weirded out while sneaking around Lau and Walsh taking pictures.

Sources: Giphy, Facebook (Georgetown Memes for Non-Conforming Jesuit Teens)

The 5 People You See During Finals

library

It is that time of year again, when rare species of students spending ungodly amount of times in ugly places. Yes, thats right, Georgetown is in the midst of finals.

I tend to think of myself as a finals connoisseur, after struggling through 5+ rounds. Due to this, I have perceived a lot of specimens that I think are extremely noteworthy. Some people thrive under the stress, while others resort to copious amounts of caffeine and uncontrollable breakdowns.

Here are the 5 people seen during finals:

1. The Cubicle Hermit: This is the person who you swear lives at Lau. From dawn to dusk they are camped out at their little slice of the library. They probably resort to drawing something depressing on the walls to deal with their isolation. These brave souls probably bring pints of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream and a blanket with them.

1

2. The Adventurous Studier: This person does not let the Georgetown bubble constrain him or her during the worst time of the year. A brief look at this person’s Instagram or Snapchat will show them being #cultured while studying for POG. Whether it be the National Mall or NYC, this person officially wins the finals game. Snaps for you.

3. The Non-Corp Corpie: Ah the elusive non-Corp, Corpie: a favorite of mine. This person isn’t in the Corp, but basically should be. They can either be seen posing with their Corp drink of choice, or refueling at a variety of Corp locations. Hey, caffeine is the name of the game during finals. Keep doing your thang.

tumblr_mctalko

4. That Late Guy/Girl: Ugh this poor soul… the person who is perpetually late during finals. Whether it be the review session or the final itself, this person is always “waking up late from a power nap.” We see you, don’t hide your laziness. You might wanna get a clock and an alarm though, not all teachers are forgiving to latecomers. 

5. The Socialite: The self-appointed king or queen of finals. This person must be in every class on campus, because they are everywhere and are talking to everyone. Their kingdom is Lau 2 and their choice lifestyle is not doing a single stitch of work. If you can afford to do this with your finals schedule, you should just go home. Get a life please.

tumblr_m7fq97PzJ21r4sjw1o1_500

So….Who are you?

Photo/Gifs: howardcc.edu; https://ohthiskid.com/; tumblr.com; orderofthegooddeath.com

Finals: As Told By “The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt”

vmk4bOc

As the week winds to an end, and the study days disappear (seriously, come back), it’s inevitable that we will all soon be facing the doom of finals.  In order to provide you with a preview of the week’s worth of misery and solitude you will soon subject yourself to in a lonely little Lau cubicle, 4E has compiled a list of our favorite gifs from the Netflix hit The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.

Because hey, you might as well describe one of the worst things ever with some of the best moments from our favorite motley crew… it might even dull the pain (disclaimer: nothing can dull the pain).

Finals, as told by Kimmy Schmidt and friends:

When your friends ask you if you’ve started to study for your Econ final that’s in 2 days.

So you decide to pack your entire life up and seek out a little Lau cubicle which will become your home for the next 48 hours. But not matter how much you try, it will still be as drab and uninviting as ever.

It’s time to get to work, so you crack open your text book for the first time of the entire semester.

After reaching for your 5th cup of coffee from Midnight, you start to realize that no matter how long you stare at your problem set it just won’t sink in.

But then you remember that nothing can stop you.  Not even evil professors who are definitely out to ruin your GPA and future career prospects.

Things still aren’t sinking in though, so you decide to actually attend your TA’s office hours on Lau 2 and you end up leaving understanding something.

In honor of your period of enlightenment, you decide to take a study break with your friends. They continue to complain about their exams and you’re all like:

After 15 minutes 2 hours, you decide to get back to work.  But studying isn’t going well, so you start to get a bit defensive. 

Then you finally catch a glimpse of yourself after spending hours on hours curled up in your cubicle home. What is sunlight?!

Seriously though, what is sunlight?  The only light you know at this point comes from the fluorescent lights that are giving you a migraine. You know no world outside of Lau. 

After 18 consecutive hours spent in Lau, you inevitably have to decide between sleep and food. You naturally try to multitask.

Before you know it, it’s the morning of your exam so you of course give yourself a pre-exam pep talk!

But then you walk into the exam room and all you can think is:

The proctor distributes the exam and you realize, after looking at the first question, that you might actually understand some of this.

You end up leaving the exam feeling confident, and you realize that despite all the torture that you’re still unbreakable.

But then, of course, you realize that you have another exam and paper due tomorrow so it looks like it’s back to Lau!

Best of luck this finals season, Hoyas.  Just remember, if the mole women could survive living in a bunker for 15 years under the supervision of Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne, then you can definitely handle a week of endless exams.

photos/gifs: imgur.com, buzzfeed.com, tumblr.com, thats-normal.com, huffingtonpost.com, photobucket.com, nerdophiles.com, broadwayworld.com

SEE THE CHERRY BLOSSOMS…From Lau!

cherryblossomslau

How is the 3rd hour of your study session? Where is that study break you intended to take?

You’ve somehow found yourself trapped in the unforgiving walls of Lau 2, wondering if the room is really full of talkative people or if it’s all just a dream? You somehow have only been living within the confines of this book filled, fun sucking metropolis, for the past week and have missed out on all of the friendly tourist filled cherry blossom hype?!

Whatever your pity story, 4E has good news: you can see the cherry blossoms from Lau!

Here’s how:

1. Enter the building.
2. Flash your card at the security/student guard while complimenting them on their shirt choice (especially if it’s uniform).
3. Rather than go to Lau 2 head to the basement, not Lau 1, the basement.
4. Find a cubicle farthest away from all windows (if there even are windows down there).
5. Sit down.
6. Try and cover the top of the cubicle to block out all light.
7. Put on your weirdest playlist to set the mood for any of other Lau-basement-ers that might be in your company.
8. Once you’re in this position you’re in a great spot for cherry blossom viewing! Just click here and enjoy.

giphy-6

If this isn’t quite what you had in mind maybe you should check out: New Jersey… Is this home?! Or Dubai… check out this water park while in Lau! Or this panda down the street, this egg hatchery or spot cute couples lounging by the ocean (ahh awkward) in St Croix!

Too bad there isn’t a view of campus to offer up- you could creep on your friends and all things going on while you continue to sit there alone in that cubicle and procrastinate.

giphy-7

Happy Studying,

<3 4E

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com; https://washington.org/

Summer InternTips: Your First Week

If you’re like me, you just finished your third day of your summer internship. You’re learning the ropes at your new job, and you’re just starting to get to know your boss, secretary and office mates. But you’re still learning the ropes. You still have to check in at the front desk as a visitor because your badge hasn’t been made yet. You’re still eating lunch alone in your office. You arrive five minutes later than you’re supposed to because you missed your bus stop. (Note: these all apply to me. It’s OK.)

Because here at 4E we know that you’re probably in the same boat, we compiled some tips for how to make your first week as productive to your internship as possible:

1. Get to know your office. Explore all of the possibilities your company, building, and neighborhood have to offer. A lot of buildings (especially on Capitol Hill) have special perks to like food courts, cafes, ice cream or fro-yo, or fancy vending machines. Some offices have green roofs for lunch breaks so you don’t have to eat in your office.

2. Learn the ropes of your work. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. This is your first week — bosses expect questions, and always prefer them to incomplete or shoddy work. Now is the time to figure out how best to finish assignments so that you can do them consistently correctly for the rest of your internship.

3. Meet your coworkers, even the ones you won’t end up working with consistently. Don’t be afraid to introduce yourself to everyone. Basically, you don’t want to be the intern that no one knows the name of come July. Plus, think networking.

4. Start off on a good foot. Though you should expect to make some mistakes, be prompt, polite, and make an effort. Your bosses will expect mistakes as well, but they’ll be watching your work ethic and demeanor this week. Even if you make mistakes, making a good effort this week will help you secure more interesting and important projects later in your internship.

5. Save your money. Unpaid and paid interns alike, we all have thin wallets. So save your money by making your lunch ahead of time and bringing it to work, taking the bus ($1.50) instead of the Metro (with an upcoming price increase in July) or a cab.

6. Stay positive. Even if your week is rough (many of ours will be), the rest of the summer won’t be. Believe in yourself and your ability to learn how to do your job, meet other interns and network with your coworkers. The first week is tough for everybody. Almost certainly, next week will be better.

7. Link in with the greater D.C. intern community. D.C. in the summer is an exciting place with tons of other college students visiting us for the summer. Even though we here at Georgetown are blessed with a hefty set of connections in D.C., it is always a good idea to meet kids from other colleges at other internships. There are plenty of blogs, Twitter feeds and Facebook pages dedicated to summer interns here. Most are only relevant to those who don’t have the privilege of living in D.C. during the school year, but they’re still good resources for anyone on the Hilltop with an internship.

Image credit: Vanity Fair