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What Clubs Famous People Would Be In At Georgetown

As one of the top 20 schools in the U.S. (and home to the hottest college men, according to Tinder), Georgetown is generally accepted as a place for the ~elite~.

We’re not an Ivy but… yeah, pretty much.

While a fair number of VIPs have walked these hallowed halls (I sometimes daydream about running into Bradley Cooper in the dish return at Leo’s), with a 16% acceptance rate, it’s hard to “catch ‘em all.”

I still cringe…

Once you’ve figured out what famous Hoya you are, come take a break from procrastinating for finals reality with me and imagine what clubs your favorite celebs would be in if they had sported the good ol’ blue and gray.

*wipes away tear*

The Kardashians – Thirty-Seventh

We all know that these gals enjoy the finer things in life. I can’t attest to their academic aspirations, but I have a good feeling that if Kardashoyans existed, they would be major contributors to Georgetown’s premier lifestyle and fashion blog. #Yeezys #For #All

If you stop reading 4E, Kim will be mad. 

Emma Watson – Blue and Gray

This is the friend that you want to hate but can’t because they’re just too nice. Smart, beautiful, vaguely international—they make Georgetown look damn good. You may resent this pal’s borderline *magical* talents, but you have to admit that this kid is going places.

A typical Georgetown know-it-all.

Mark Ruffalo – The Corp

To all my Ruffalovers out there, this one’s for you. This Bernie Bro can sport a knit fleece like no other, and will engage you in a long-winded discussion on conspiracy theories if you so much as whisper the words “inside job.” Can’t you imagine the man behind The Hulk, once dubbed a “sentient farmer’s market,” serving you your double shot of espresso at Midnight MUG with a crinkly, good-natured smile? We know we can.

That woven bracelet tho :-O

Ivanka Trump – GUASFCU

The First Daughter was a student in the MSB for two years before transferring to Penn (*cough* complicit). Her penchant for fancy shoes and ambiguous business buzz-words would make her a prime candidate for Georgetown’s most prestigious financial association.

If you don’t sleep in a suit, are you really an MSBro?

Zac Efron – GUGS

The High School Musical and Neighbors star is truly a man of the people. For this reason, he’d be a member of one of Georgetown’s most accepting clubs, flipping delicious meat spheres burgers for the masses on Friday afternoons. *sings We’re All In This Together with added enthusiasm*

 
If only Georgetown had real frats…
 
 
Stay warm, people. If Bradley Cooper made it through finals, so can we.
 
 
Photos/GIFS: youtube.com, giphy.com, fastccompany.net
 
 
 
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The Best and the Worst: Bachelor 2016

Wow, here we are. After three solid losses, Bachelor Nick Viall is a ripe 36 and still ready to find love. His hobbies include being awkward, mumbling, and extending his 15 minutes of fame, which are all key qualities that will blow his bachelorettes away. After chatting with his “super-close” yet highly critical bros Sean, Chris, and Ben, who also happen to be former Bachelors, Nick kicked off the season with an interesting set of women. Some are cute and some are wild, which is why I’ve created an explanatory and categorized low-down of our remaining Bachelor women (you’re welcome).

The Stand-Outs

Danielle M. 

Danielle is an automatic front-runner. She’s gorgeous, takes care of little babies in the hospital and has a softer voice than my government professor, whom I literally cannot hear at all. Also, their first conversation was a seamless one about how they both make great French toast…I mean, you can’t beat that.

Danielle L. 

Whether it was her super low-cut dress or her sweet personality, Danielle #2 made a great first impression right out of the limo. Since then, she’s scored an exciting serenade from the Backstreet Boys and smooches from Nick, so she’s showing lots of potential for the future.

Rachel

Rachel’s an attorney from Dallas, Texas, which basically means she has her sh*t together way more than literally anyone else on this show. She’s gotten the first impression rose and a date rose, so we know that Nick is super into this one.

The Danger Zone

Corinne

We know Corinne likes cucumbers made by her nanny Raquel, but someone should actually go get her a glass of water. This girl is so thirsty it kills me. In addition to talking aggressively making out with Nick without knowing much about him, Corinne enjoys frequently interrupting the other girls and openly shedding clothes at any moment in time. Also, PSA: Raquel actually has a Go Fund Me page up now, so make sure to contribute to her future caregiving endeavors!

Straight-Up Crazies

Alexis

Alexis strutted up to the Bachelor mansion in nothing but a much-debated dolphin/shark costume. She loves-loves-loves dolphins much more than any adult woman should, and she makes it clear that her beloved sea friends are the priority (sorry Nick!).

Josephine

Josephine showed up and tried to woo Nick by forcibly insisting he eat a raw hot dog with her. It was almost as awkward as when she gave him a cringe-worthy serenade about wanting a one-on-one with him this last episode. Outlook = hazy.

The Weird Ones

Christen

Christen decided to wear a yellow dress the first night, which was her first bad move. Next she told Nick that she “watched him on TV for the past 3 years” and that she thought she was “meeting a celebrity.” I think Nick wanted to awkward-smile and cry at the same time.

Jaimi

There’s not much we know about Jaimi at this point, other than her interesting first impression where she told Nick she “has balls.” Turned out to be a nose ring, but she all had us wondering what exactly she meant by that…

Contestants That Make You Go “Eh”

Vanessa

Vanessa’s a fine contestant, minus her recent stunt of accidental puking on her first date. Though her one-on-one was pretty successful,  her generally forced humor and mom-like personality docks some points.

Taylor

Taylor comes off as sweet and knowledgeable…but is she? She seems cute, but she sometimes gives us the know-it-all vibe. Plus, this may be an unpopular opinion, but I don’t really see any real connection between her and Nick. Sorry?

 

Jasmine G.

Jasmine is interesting and spunky, but again, I see no fiery spark with the man in the house. Eh.

The Ones We’re Thankful For

Chris Harrison

I know what you’re thinking, and you’re right. Chris is not one of Nick’s many lady friends. Yet, his presence on the show is so essential. His brief announcements of when there is a final rose are critical–how else would we know there’s only one rose left? You have to admit that Chris is a long time fan favorite.

Sarah

Sarah’s cute, funny, and seems normal so far. We must be thankful for her energy and appreciate her “in” hairstyle. Also, most people probably didn’t catch this, but her first words in the house were “Oh my God, there’s food!” which makes her more relatable than most.

Raven

I have to admit, Raven has definitely grown on me since I first saw her dangerously strolling along train tracks in her bio. She seems to be adorable and genuine. Cross your fingers she’s not one who only gets far enough to get her heart broken.

…Who?

Kristina

I think I remember crying at one point in time, but I can’t be too sure.

Whitney

Whitney might have a chance with Nick if she ever…you know, talked.

Astrid

It’s possible she was in a hot tub with Nick, but that’s literally all I remember of her.

Brittany

Brittany, are you even on the show?

…I give up.

Photos: abc.com

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Twitter Feud Alert: Madeleine Albright vs. Conan O’Brien

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Our favorite Georgetown professor and former Secretary of State is already quite the tweeter, but she’s outdone herself now. After comedian Conan O’Brien tweeted he’d be dressing as a “slutty Madeleine Albright,” Madeleine fired back. See the full Twitter “feud” below:

Sassy, Madeleine. We like it.

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Confessions of a Confession Page Celeb

DJ

If you follow Georgetown Confessions on Facebook, you may have noticed a trend in recent posts.  Over the past few weeks, there have been several confessions posted about a certain Georgetown cutie who seems to have caught the attention of students across campus.  While he may not be the biggest man on campus, he’s definitely the big man on campus at the moment.  For those of you still in the dark, I’m referring to 4E’s very own D.J. Angelini.

Now of course, you may find yourself asking, “Who is this D.J. Angelini and why is everyone posting about him?”  If such questions have been keeping you up late at night, you’ll be pleased to know that 4E has got you covered. I recently sat down with the man who inspires the confessions to get the exclusive scoop on what life is like as a self-proclaimed “big deal”.  So without further ado, D.J. Angelini …

 How are you handling your newfound fame?  

My newfound fame has definitely been exciting to say the least. My favorite moment was when I was walking in Lau and I overheard this freshman girl say, ‘Really? THAT’S the kid all of these confessions are about? SERIOUSLY!? HIM? I don’t agree…’ I would say that was a defining moment of my sophomore year so far.

Post by Georgetown Confessions.

 

 

Would you say these confessions are an accurate representation of yourself?

I think we can acknowledge all of these confessions are grossly overblown. I mean, one person wrote that my roommate was better looking than me! Obviously, I don’t agree with that one.

Any idea about who’s writing these confessions? Anything you’d like to say to them?

I have my suspicions about who’s writing these confessions. If I had to guess, it’s probably either the cleaning lady in Regents who roughly (but flirtatiously?) stabs me in the head with the back of her mop to wake me up when I’m taking naps in the wee hours of the morn. Or it’s the lady at Salad Creations who doesn’t charge me when I ask for extra croutons. Either way, I’d be happy. I guess I’d say to them that Georgetown Confessions is not a great way to compliment me. I mean, they only post every two weeks. I can’t wait that long. Just text me or something jeez!

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Do you consider yourself a big deal?

I’ve had five or six people anonymously mention my name in a rarely viewed Georgetown-specific Facebook page frequented by incoming freshmen and five kids studying in Lau on a Friday night. Wouldn’t you say that makes me a big deal?

So there you have it, straight from the Georgetown celeb himself. And for all you Tinder-ers out there, make sure to keep your eye out for D.J.!  He’s been crushing it lately with his right-swipe-to-match ratio (likely due to his new fame and awesome 4E articles).

Photos: Georgetown Confessions and Facebook courtesy of D.J. Angelini; Gifs: blogspot.com, tumblr.com, wifflegif.com, likegif.com

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Perez Hilton Spends the Fourth in DC

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Yesterday, while you were celebrating America, Perez Hilton was taking in the sites of Georgetown and Washington, D.C. Before venturing over to Georgetown, the celebrity blogger spent time at some of D.C.’s most popular tourist attractions on July 3 and 4. He posted the picture below to his Instagram account of him with his mother, Teresita Lavandeira, and his 1-year-old son, Mario Armando Lavandeira III,  at the Capitol.

Later in the day, Hilton visited some of Georgetown’s classic spots. He conquered the Exorcist Steps:

He was put off by the line outside of Georgetown Cupcake. Clearly no one told him about Baked and Wired:

And he had the same thoughts we all have when walking past the gigantic townhouses in Georgetown — I wish I could live here:

Finally, he made his way to campus and was as impressed as we all were the first time we saw Healy:

He showed off his patriotism on the lawn:

We can’t think of a better way to spend the Fourth of July than visiting Georgetown’s campus — good choice, Perez.