Dinner with 7 “Strangers”: A Recipe for Disaster?

DINNER

A new and mysterious program, Dinner with 7 Strangers, has taken the Hoya world by storm, and 4E has several questions:

Who’s in charge?

What if I get stuck with a bunch of duds?

Is this some type of elaborate scam to expose people who are desperate for friends?

Although the premise of the program is to meet new people and have dinner with strangers, there’s always the possibility that your dinner might include awkward acquaintances and people you semi-know, or people you never want to see again.

Here are 7 people you might meet at your dinner with 7 “strangers”:

1. You know who they are, but you don’t know if it’s because you stalked them on Facebook one night at 2:00 am. Do they know who you are? Should you address them by name? WHAT DO YOU DO?!?!?!?!
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2. That boy you hooked up with at Brown House, only to realize you had Econ and Problem of God together. Also, you’ve butt-dialed him several times despite the fact that you haven’t talked to him since the DFMO. Now you’re sitting across the dinner table from him.
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3. Your professor whose class you slept through every single day. Also, your final paper was accidentally written in Comic Sans.

4. Your nightmare roommate from freshman year who you ditched second semester and never talked to again. They ate weird food in your bed and barfed on your pillow, and watching them eat their meal is giving you horrible flashbacks.
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5. The GERMS worker who rescued you after you fell down Harbin stairs and/or slipped in your own vomit.
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6. Your future husband/wife. According to super scientific studies that Blue and Gray tour guides like to relay in order to get overly eager parents excited about grandkids, 70% of Hoyas marry other Hoyas. Wouldn’t it be a great story to tell if you meet your future spouse on what boils down to a blind date with 6 other random people?

7. Hey, you never know, maybe you will get to eat with Bradley Cooper! Can Georgetown Alumni sign up? Please say yes! One date dinner with him and, who knows, maybe you will be on the cover of People.

In reality, Dinner with 7 Strangers sounds really cool and you should sign up. You might get the opportunity to meet some really incredible people *cough* me *cough*. Or you might have the most uncomfortable two hours of your life. Either way, you are sure to have some wonderful stories to tell. Also, free food.

Photos/Gifs: replygif.net, reactiongifs.com, imgur (@gidget), facebook.com

DFMO or Dating?

datingadvice

We here at 4E excel at a few things… like channeling our inner Beyoncé, partaking in debauchery and giving dating advice, allegedly.

Word of that last area of expertise seems to have reached our readers, as we received a letter from a seemingly distressed freshman in desperate need of our guidance. Hopefully our response will be enough to help her navigate the many trials and tribulations of being a freshman looking for l-o-v-e, love.

Hey 4E,

I’m writing to you because I need your advice, like really badly. So there was this guy, let’s just call him “Steve”, in my Problem of God class last semester who I totally liked. He definitely looked like Bradley Cooper combined with Ryan Reynolds, but he was also super sensitive like Ryan Gosling. Anyway, I think he was super into me too because he used to sit next to me in class every time we had a reading quiz. I’m pretty sure he really wanted to talk to me, but he was definitely just too shy to make a move.

So fast forward to last weekend. I decided to go out with about 15 of my closest friends because we heard this crazy party was going on at Brown House. We made sure to get there around 10:30 p.m. so we could get in before it got way too crowded. All 15 of us got in no problem though because my roommate’s sister’s friend was the bouncer and was totally psyched to see us at his party. The party was so much fun and so #college that I had to document as much of it as I possibly could on my SnapChat story. I was trying to take a selfie with all my friends (should have brought my selfie stick, rookie mistake) when I saw Steve across the room. “Shake It Off” started playing, and I knew this was my chance. Long story short, things got super crazy because Steve and I totally DFMO’ed at Brown House!

Now, here’s my problem. I’m really into Steve and clearly he’s really into me, what should I do?! I just feel like we need to talk about what happened and define this relationship. My friends think I’m overreacting to this DFMO, but I think Steve could be the one … especially because my tour guide told me 60% of Hoyas marry other Hoyas.

Please help me 4E!

Lovestruck Freshman

Dear Lovestruck Freshman,

First off, your friends are obviously crazy because you’re definitely not overreacting! In fact, you might even be under-reacting. If you really think Steve could be the one, then you’ll definitely want to define things before he finds another girl to DFMO with next weekend.

There’s a few things you can do to ensure that your relationship is defined before it gets to that point. First off, I suggest you send him a Facebook relationship request as soon as you can. Nothing clears up ambiguity quite like this direct approach, plus Steve will really appreciate your willingness to take control of the situation.

While you wait for him to inevitably accept your request you should take it upon yourself to stalk him on every form of social media back to 2007. Bonus points if you can find his old MySpace page! You’ll want to know everything you possibly can about Steve to prove just how dedicated you are to making this relationship work. Try not to get jealous when you see old posts about his 7th grade girlfriend, she was so 2008 anyway. Next, figure out which dorm Steve lives in and where he has class so you can casually wait around for him and ask why he hasn’t responded to your Facebook relationship request. Let him know that you really want to clear things up regarding your Brown House DFMO and make sure he knows that you really see a future for the two of you.

If this approach doesn’t work and Steve ends up thinking that you are certifiably insane, then he obviously isn’t worth your time. Go ahead and cry over a pint of Ben & Jerry’s, because they’re the only boys you need in your life anyway!

Love forever,

4E

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Disclaimer: This letter is entirely fictional and does not reflect the views of any Georgetown freshman. Also, we’re really bad at giving advice.

Photo/Gif: imgur.com; affordablepsychicreadings.com

A New Phenomenon: Georgetown Geofilters

healysnapchat

If you’ve been using Snapchat in the past several months, you’ve obviously noticed their new geofilter feature. Or, if you’re technologically challenged like me, you might have no idea what I’m talking about.

For everyone out there still struggling to understand the new, hip lingo of our generation, I’ll explain. Geofilters essentially allow you to be even more obnoxious about the amazing places you go. (Good thing I didn’t know about this during study abroad!)

geofiltersGeofilters are small graphic designs that you can add to your original Snapchat photo that specify the location you’re in. For example:

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It’s pretty similar to geotagging a post on Facebook or Instagram. Don’t mind me, I’m just in the Bahamas for spring break – we might like your Instagram, but we secretly hate you. It is obnoxious in the best way possible.

So for the jetsetters out there, this is your chance to make everyone even more jealous of you. As for the rest of us who are bound 2 the 202, here are some Georgetown geofilters that 4E believes need to exist. (Note: a Georgetown DC one does exist, but it’s about as basic as they get. We can do better.)

  • Lau. All those snaps you send of yourself miserably studying in that cubicle will become that much funnier by letting everyone know exactly where you are. This geofilter definitely needs to be dark and grumpy like the building itself and the constant mood of all its inhabitants.
  • Brown house. Those late night regrettable Snapchats will only be more embarrassing by openly admitting that your current location is the infamous Brown house. Although, deep down you know you secretly love it there. Don’t lie. (Just don’t add it to Our Campus Story.)
  • The Corp. Each Corp location should probably have its own geotag, and you know that every single one will be super edgy and hipster with a bunch of Corpies doing the designs. Eating that Hilltoss salad? Geotag it! Quick coffee between classes in the ICC? Snapchat it or it didn’t happen!
  • Heal Fam Stu Cen. I’m still not really sure what we’re calling this building, but it’s so beautiful that it deserves its own geotag. I’m not sure you could fit all the letter of its name on a Snapchat though. If you could, you would immediately win the Snapchat game.
  • Leo’s. The good, the bad, the ugly, the Leo’s geotag would capture all of this. Who needs Instagram when you can Snapchat your Leo’s meals? Am I right?

Well luckily for us, it is apparently now possible to make your own geofilters! So for all the tech kids out there get cracking! Be sure to check this link for more info on how to do it.

I expect to see some great geofilters popping up in my Snapchat inbox soon! And yes, that is a challenge.

Photos/Gifs: support.snapchat.com, https://static5.businessinsider.com/, https://images.businessweek.com/, https://blogs-images.forbes.com/

Georgetown eCards: Sass to the Max

It’s finals season for universities all over the country, and people are looking for ways to procrastinate. The 4E staff has collaborated to offer you a very Hilltop-specific method of getting nothing done for a few minutes. Share and enjoy!

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A Georgetown By Any Other Name

We all know the names SoHo and TriBeCa, with their signature New Yorker “we’re-too-busy-to-say-the-whole-name-of-the-neighborhood-so-we-abbreviate-it-in-a-super-hip-way” thing. Well, according to DCist, our own District of Columbia is falling into the same trap. The area formerly known as “Mount Vernon Square” has now been dubbed SoNYA (South of New York Avenue). Only time will tell if this name will actually stick, but in the mean time, shall we take a moment to re-evaluate  the names of a few well-known campus locations? Yes. We shall.

BroHo Oh, the infamous Brown House. I now dub thee “BroHo” for a variety of reasons. Firstly, I’d imagine that the term “Brown House” is used most frequently in Saturday-night texting (See example here). This new abbreviation saves you the pain of those 5 extra letters AND a space. Thats like a whole .3 seconds of your time. You’re welcome. Secondly, well…I mean…it’s “BroHo”. It’s just fitting for the demographic that frequents Brown House…hah.

BeBR (pronounced “Bieber”) Meaning “Between Business and Regents”, meaning ‘between the business school and Regents Hall’, meaning the stairs leading up to the Leavey Center. To use it in a sentence, “I really want to go to UG for an Eleanor Rigby, meet me at BeBR?” or “I hate BeBR, his songs are annoying”. Oh wait…no, that’s the other thing, but you get the idea.

SoReS The area formerly known as “Healy Lawn”? We now refer to it as “South of Red Square”. Does it sound a little disgusting? Yes. But then again, so is Healy Lawn when they put all that gross stuff on the grass and fence it off. To use it in a sentence “Yeah, SoReS smells really bad today.” It’s applicable in all of the ways.

So, what do you think of all this abbreviation nation? What’s next? Shortening “LXR”? We’ll see, but for now, I’ll be on SoReS enjoying this nice weather.

 Photo: Georgetown University