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Who Should Georgetown’s Next Basketball Coach Be?

Many Georgetown students and alumni have been waiting in high anticipation as the school searches for a new men’s basketball coach to replace the recently fired, John Thompson III. Names including Shaka Smart, Tommy Amaker, and Patrick Ewing have been discussed, but nobody really knows who the new coach will be until Georgetown announces it. In the meantime, here are some creative suggestions from Tyler Park (COL ’18), a contributing editor to The Hoya, on who might be able to fill the role.

1. Allen Iverson

Pros: A true Georgetown legend and perhaps the coolest player in NBA history, Iverson would have no trouble recruiting talent to come play for his team. Iverson said recently that he would never coach in the NBA because, “I ain’t coaching no motherf****** that make more money than me.” Well, good news — NCAA athletes, theoretically at least, aren’t paid at all! It’s a perfect fit!

Cons: The team would never practice, which might not bode well for their chances on the court.

2. Michael Scott

Pros: An exceptional leader who has built a strong culture in his current job, Michael Scott would bring a great sense of humor to the locker room, and to the media. Also, he has shown an interest in mentoring young people in the past, as shown by “Scott’s Tots” — you should re-watch this episode.

Cons: Showed questionable judgment during the one basketball game he actually coached. Inexplicably cut Kevin Malone from the roster, which is one of the worst managerial decisions any coach has ever made.

3. Bill Belichick

Pros: Winning Super Bowls might be getting too easy for Belichick, who could look for a new challenge in a new sport and a new city.

Cons: Unless we can recruit Tom Brady to play point guard, this might not go as well as it has for the Patriots.

4. John Thompson IV

Pros: Keep it in the family!

Cons: As far as I know, John Thompson IV does not exist.

5. Chris Grosse

Chris Grosse, Assistant Athletics Director for Marketing at Georgetown University

Pros: For those of you who don’t know Chris Grosse, he is the mind behind many of Georgetown’s recent creative marketing ideas, including “Hail to Kale” night, “Dad Bod,” day, and the Skater Jack bobblehead. Grosse is a creative talent and would be able to design a unique style of play to befuddle Georgetown’s opponents.

Cons: Grosse is pretty much irreplaceable as Georgetown’s marketing guy, so we would probably need to conduct another nationwide search to find his replacement. That seems counterproductive.

6. Eric Taylor

Pros: A true leader of men and a championship-level coach, Taylor has mentored some of the greatest athletes of our generation, including Tim Riggins, Vince Howard, and Matt Saracen. Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can’t Lose.

Cons: He would probably have a pretty big adjustment transitioning from being a football coach to a basketball coach. Also, he’s another fictional character who doesn’t actually exist.

7. Barack Obama

Pros: Obama is currently out of work, knows the D.C. area, is passionate about the game of basketball, and would be able to recruit basically any player in the country. He also knows how to handle the media and is an excellent communicator.

Cons: I can’t really think of any reasons why this isn’t a great idea. Make it happen, Lee Reed!

Photos/gifs: giphy.com, guhoyas.com

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President Obama Congratulates Georgetown

Charter Birthday

Today marks the 200th anniversary of Georgetown’s charter, officially incorporating the university into the District of Columbia. Signed by James Madison back in 1815, our current president, Barack Obama, weighed in on the momentous occasion today with a video uploaded onto Youtube.

“As your neighbor, I thought I’d say hello and congratulate you on the 200th anniversary of your charter,” President Obama begins, while then delving into the many varied accomplishments of Hoyas over time, and emphasizing the influence of Georgetown’s Jesuit values in different fields. Basically, the President thinks we’re awesome, thus confirming what we knew all along.

You can watch the full (less than 1 minute-long) video below. It’s totally worth it, especially for the very end. Hearing POTUS say “Hoya Saxa” is truly a transcendent experience that I will totally #humblebrag about in the future.

Other government leaders congratulated Georgetown today too, including Speaker of the House John Boehner, House Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi and Senator Patrick Leahy.

Oh, and we just heard from Bill Clinton!

Check out the university’s statement (plus all of the congratulatory videos) here. Actually, if you want to check out the charter (it’s short), go for it.

So happy birthday, Georgetown, and Hoya Saxa!

(This post has been updated.)

Photo: sfs.georgetown.edu

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The Colbert Report Is Coming to GW

Colbert at GW

Stephen Colbert will be interviewing President Barack Obama at George Washington University on Monday, Dec. 8 as part of a special episode of one of 4E’s favorite shows, the late-night satirical television show “The Colbert Report”.

The episode is titled “Stephen Colbert Presents: Mr. Colbert Goes to Washington D.C. Ya Later, Legislator: Partisan is Such Sweet Sorrow: A Colbert Victory Lap, ‘014.” So basically, what you would expect it to be titled.

Some lucky GW kids got free tickets through a lottery this week. Although most Georgetown students don’t have tickets to the event, we can still speculate about what the interview will entail.

Colbert will probably grill Obama about recent decisions made by the government (or lack thereof). Some classic themes that the plebeians will recognize are the mid-term elections and possibly the Ebola epidemic.

He might make some comment about Obama’s quick aging over the last few years, and he might inquire about the Obama family’s holiday plans: Will they be jetting off to Hawaii to soak up the warm weather? Heading abroad for some international sightseeing? Staying in Washington to revel in the friendly and un-jaded atmosphere?

Colbert seems excited to visit the capital of the nation he loves to hate: “Washington has been the Report’s second home, and I will be returning on Monday to show it the same affection the British did in 1812.”

He is looking forward to seeing the monuments, better known as “that big toothpick,” “mega-Lincoln,” and “the pool with that handsome man staring out at it.”

Tune in Monday night to see this particularly star-studded special of The Colbert Report. It’s sure to be a thriller! Just try to forget that they picked GW over Georgetown.

Photo: mashable.com

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Since Last We Met …

4EguesswhatWe’re baaaaack. You’ve missed us. We’ve missed you. At long last, the 4E drought is over. Seeing as it’s been so long since last we met, let’s make up for lost time. Here are five of the stories we missed while we were gone.

1. There was unrest in the kingdom.

Two weeks ago, leaked elevator footage of American royalty, Jay-Z and Beyoncé, and the royal-by-association Solange proved that celebrities are just like us. Some of us are lovers, some are fighters and some do absolutely nothing at all. In this case, I’m referring to Jay-Z, Solange and Beyoncé, respectively. Below, the brawl is re-enacted in gif form.

2. We work out.

Washington D.C. was just ranked as the fittest city in the country. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that it’s definitely because Georgetown keeps its Sweetgreen and Lululemon game strong.

3. Barack Obama went for a casual walk in D.C., and people freaked out.

This video below pretty much says it all:

4. We can finally enjoy the view.

The Washington Monument is finally reopened. Your Instagram followers will be overjoyed. Watch the action unfold:

5. Finally, rapper 50 Cent “successfully” threw the first pitch at a New York Mets game.

Yup.

Don’t worry — now that we’re back, we’ll be here all summer to keep you up to date on everything happening in Georgetown, D.C. and pop culture. Stay tuned!

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Score Some Election Day Freebies

Did you vote in the general election? If your answer was no, shame on you — head out right now, you can register on site to vote in D.C. The Duke Ellington School is a polling place, and they’re open until 8 p.m. If your answer was, yes, high five! That “I Voted” sticker you got after you cast your ballot just got way more awesome (sorry, absentee ballot voters).

Besides the warm feeling of patriotism in your chest, that sticker can earn you a snack free of charge – lots of places are giving away free stuff or bonus items with purchase. And while some of them require an “I Voted” sticker, some of these places are just in the spirit of election day giving.

We’ve compiled a few places here, but be sure to leave any more places that you know of in the comments section!

Yoga Studios The D.C. yoga community is offering free yoga classes all day today. Stop by Lulu Lemon, Down Dog, or Georgetown Yoga to stretch out some of your nerves before the election results start pouring in. There are even more yoga studios participating, check out the full list here.

Starbucks While you won’t be seeing any free coffee this election day, you can score a red white and blue bracelet reading “INDIVISIBLE” when you stop by for coffee.

Shake Shack Grab yourself a free Presidential Caramel custard when you fill out a Pledge to Vote card at the Shake Shack in Dupont Circle.

Einstein Brothers Bagels The “I Voted” sticker will earn you a free bagel with cream cheese at Einstein Bros – unconfirmed whether or not it will work at our mini Einstein stands, but it’s worth a try!

Z-Burger It’s a bit of a trek, but Z-Burger is giving away free burgers to customers with a sticker from the voting booth (or you can say “ZVote” at the register). There’s a Z-Burger on Wisconsin Ave. in Glover Park (just past the Whole Foods). And trust us, they’re delicious.

Ben and Jerry’s A free cone with your sticker (this would be a pretty good time to grab the Americone Dream flavor).

Mellow Mushroom This Adams Morgan bar is hosting an election night party starting at 8 p.m. No sticker needed, but if you check in on Facebook with three other friends, you’ll snag a free pitcher of swing state beer – you can choose between Colorado, Ohio and Virginia.

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Sunday Night Wrapup: Debates and Baseball

No doubt that most of you are drained from all the midterms and papers you’ve been having to get through. But, you have no excuses now because of the three day weekend (thank you, Christopher Columbus). It’s likely that you missed a lot of the week’s going ons because of the workload (or, for the lucky few, relaxation), so here’s what went down this weekend:

  • The Presidential Debate was this past Wednesday and the general consensus among political commentators is that Governor Mitt Romney won. Even those that think that he didn’t win the debate admit that he surprised everyone by avoiding any gaffes and articulating some clear points. Look forward to the Vice Presidential debate on October 11.
  • The NBA released a video that explains what a “flop” is. In case you haven’t heard, the league is taking steps to stop players from exaggerating contact in order to draw calls. There’s some disagreement over how effective this program will be, but something needs to be done and this is a step in the right direction for most basketball enthusiasts.
  • Stop hatin’ on Leo’s! They’ve apparently corrected their health-code violations that have been causing quite a stir on campus. You can take someone else’s burger order without worrying about what else is in it now.
  • The baseball post-season is here! The Nationals will be taking on the Cardinals at tomorrow at 4:37 p.m. in St. Louis and at 1:07 p.m. Wednesday in D.C. — leggo Nats!