bae – The Fourth Edition | The Hoya’s Blog

January 30, 2018January 30, 2018

4E’s Guide to Cuffing Season Playoffs

With just two weeks until the Cuffing Season Super Bowl on Feb. 14, we’re coming down to the playoff push. We here at 4E want to ensure we all make it through the end of the season unscathed, so we have advice for everyone, no matter how your season has gone so far. Let’s start with…

You’ve Got a Bae.

You’re firmly in a playoff spot this cuffing season. It would take a string of bad losses to fall out of this position. Now, you need to buckle down and focus. Continue to take it one game at a time: No forgetting date nights and no leaving them unseen. God help you if you lose your Snapstreak. You can almost taste the chocolate and smell the roses — just don’t mess it up.

You’ve Maybe Got a Bae.

At 4E we have a very simple mantra: DTR. You must — and we cannot stress this lesson enough — define the relationship. No team can make it to the Super Bowl without a set roster. It’s just impossible. This situation might take a couple texts; it might take an *adult* conversation.

You can’t take someone out to dinner on Feb. 14 as a friend — unless you want to. That’s actually totally cool. It’s 2018.

You Definitely Don’t Got a Bae.

Rarely would we ever advocate poor shot selection, but sometimes shooters have to shoot. The great quarterbacks forget the losses. The great shooters always think the next one is going in. You might need to fire a couple “sup” chats, maybe a couple of subtle smiles to strangers on the Chick-fil-A line, maybe some not-so-subtle winks. Maybe you’ve been in the gym all season working on your jumpshot. We can’t all ride the bench forever. It’s definitely not too late in the season to put together a little run and sneak into the playoffs — it’s your time to prove the haters wrong!

You’ve Got a Couple Baes.

This one is maybe the toughest situation. You’ve been experimenting with your rotation all season. Nobody knows who’s starting or who’s riding the bench. As the coach and general manager of your squad, you have to make some tough cuts. You might have to trade some players for future draft picks. If worse comes to worst, you could be looking at waiving some players or buying out some contracts. It’s the cost of doing business.

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, nydailynews.com

February 11, 2016

Georgetown Themed Breakup Lines

Unhappy with your current bae? Stuck in a relationship that you want out of STAT, but don’t know how to convey it? With Valentine’s Day rolling around, these questions need to be dealt with immediately, before you are stuck at an expensive and annoying dinner with said lacking bae.

Thankfully, the place (AKA the single AF girl) who brought you Georgetown themed pickup lines and Georgetown themed rejection lines is back for one more round. Now, it’s time for part three: the best Georgetown themed break-up lines.

I would love to keep dating you, but I prefer to spend my time people watching in Lau.

Our love is like the ICC: complicated and not worth putting effort into.

I Bleed Hoya Blue, but that doesn’t mean I love you.

I hate your GUTS.

Hoya Hoya Saxa, it’s time to face the fact-a that this relationship isn’t working.

I’m liberally leaving this relationship, no continuity.

Lie down forever lie down.

You’re not the only Hot Chick in my life.

Let’s be like the printers in ICC and break [up] permanently.

The Dahlgren Fountain is deeper than you are.

I wish our relationship was a victim of the Cherry Tree Massacre.

You are like the Walsh elevators, too slow and not worth waiting for.

It’s not you, it’s your Corp order.

ICC you cheated on me.

Our relationship has less than 99 days left.

And, for those of you who love 4E: I’m leaving you 4Ever

Hope these lines bring you some luck in ending those god awful relationships. And those on the receiving side, you probably should have seen this coming…

Photos/Gifs: blog.peekawoo.com; tumblr.com; smosh.com, addiction.com

February 10, 2016February 10, 2016

Quiz: How Romantic Are You? The Georgetown Edition

Love is like a shower in Darnall: it’s not always as hot or consistent as you would like, but it has its warm patches that make it worthwhile.

Whether you’re someone’s BAE, BAE-less, or on avid BAE-watch, we all need a little love on the Hilltop. In honor of V-day, find out how romantic you are by taking this objective quiz.

[playbuzz-game game=”https://www.playbuzz.com/keatono10/georgetown-edition-how-romantic-are-you”]

Photo: playbuzz.com

January 27, 2016

Love On The Hilltop

As Valentine’s Day is approaching, every Georgetown student without a significant other is focusing more on their academic and professional lives and less on their love lives. Hoyas seem to think that, by this time in the school year, if you haven’t connected with your crush, then you never will.

Also Saturday night, Sunday night, Monday night… You get it.

We at 4E know that that is absolutely wrong! Especially as this ~Day of Love~ is approaching, no Hoya should ever be alone.

Get some inspiration from the websites below to connect with Hoyas just like you so you can rest easy knowing who you’ve found bae just in time for the most love-filled holiday of the year:

1. Jesuit Flames: This Valentine’s season, the Passion isn’t just for Christ. Before you set fire to the world, set fire to your love life and connect with another Jesuit-value-embodier today!

2. Ex-Pat Passions: You left your home country for a reason! Drop those Internation-NOs and find your Ameri-CAN today.

3. Vegan Bar Baes: Tired of Hoyas who only want Vegan banana bread, and not you? Look no further! Discover love without the mess of animal products!4. Lau 5 Lovers: Are you finding trouble meeting Hoyas because you’re too committed to your studies? Never again wonder if YOU could be that guy or girl getting it on in the stacks. Find your study soulmate today!

Who says Lau isn't romantic? — Who says Lau isn’t romantic?

5. Burnett’s Meets Epicurean: Don’t have time in your day for a Coffee Meets Bagel date?Meet your crush when it’s most convenient: when you’re looking for some love, but mostly just looking for drunk eats. Never go home alone (or hungry) again!

6. Yates n’ Dates: Need a real cardiovascular workout? Try this site, which pairs you with the people you’ve spent the most time staring at through the mirrors around Yates!

staring mirror — Disclaimer: You may match with yourself if you’re one of those people…

Good luck finding ~your~ loved one!

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, goplengo.xyz

October 14, 2015

PSA: No One Wants to Netflix & Chill

It’s 3 a.m. on a Saturday night, and you’re standing outside of your room trying to unlock your door while not dropping your keys, Epi Quesadilla or dignity. Just as you stumble through the door, your phone goes off. You look down and see you’ve just received a text from that ~special person~ who only seems to text you once all the bars are closed and SNAPS has shut down every Village A rooftop. Nevertheless, you’re still excited to see that name on your phone and drop everything, including the quesadilla, in your rush to see what they sent. The message reads: “Netflix and chill?”

Your excitement quickly fades, surely there must have been a slightly more original way to ask for that late night hangout. You’re unimpressed, decide that text doesn’t even warrant a response and head to bed. In the end, no one wins when such an unoriginal pickup line is used. So, in an attempt to relieve Georgetown of the Netflix & Chill plague, 4E has compiled a list of the newest alternatives that are guaranteed to elicit positive responses.

Amazon Prime & Fine Wine: Some people are about the finer things in life, so a simple Netflix & Chill text just won’t suffice. Hit up Wisey’s for a bottle of their finest Woodbridge and grab your nicest plastic wine glasses, because there’s no way you’ll be rejected when using this line.
Hulu & HU: There’s no need to disguise your true intentions when asking to Netflix & Chill. You might as well be straightforward because honestly goes a long way, and nothing could be more direct than this text. It’s all on the table, so they can either take it or leave it. (Note: For you non-trendy Hoyas who aren’t up to date, “HU” is the new term for hook up)
RedBox & Relationship: Maybe you’re ready to take your late night encounters to the next level. Using the old Netflix & Chill line won’t really get this point across, so sending this text is really your best alternative. Plus, you’ll get to avoid the general awkwardness of actually talking and defining your relationship.
VHS & Viagra: Honestly, if you’re old enough to still own a VHS player you probably need the Viagra to go along with it. There’s really not much else to say about this line other than to use it sparingly.
Put Locker & Procreate: Seriously, who doesn’t want to procreate to an illegal video streaming website?

So go forth and embrace your creativity. Putting in this extra effort really might help you seal the deal.

Photos/Gifs: tumblr.com, moejackson.com

October 14, 2015

WORD WEDNESDAY: “Bae” vs. “Side Bae”

Bae is used as a warm word of endearment when referring to a boyfriend, girlfriend or even a Chipotle burrito. Now, an emerging phenomena known as the side bae is sweeping the campus. But how does one define a side bae, and what distinguishes a side bae from a bae?

Are you your crush’s bae or side bae? 4E is here to settle these pressing questions:

According to the relationship experts, “If you’re in a relationship and worried that your significant other might have a side bae, odds are that it’s you.”

If you’re single or in some sort of confusing modern relationship “thing,” take the quiz below to find out where you stand.

[playbuzz-game game=”https://www.playbuzz.com/thefourthedition10/the-moment-of-truth”]

Photos/Gifs: memegenerator.net, mstarz.com

September 24, 2015

So, You Want to Netflix & Chill?

With a new crop of students roaming the Hilltop comes a new set of questions to be answered. At 4E, we’ve already received numerous emails asking questions like:

“How can I avoid the freshman 15?” It’s unavoidable.

and

“How do I do laundry?” Honestly who knows, just call your mom.

However, seeing as how the answers to such problems could easily be looked up on Google, we haven’t felt compelled to grace these young Hoyas with our words of wisdom. That is, until we received the following email:

Hey 4E,

I’m really in need of your help. I saw some of your posts a while back where you gave pretty solid advice, and I’m so desperate I thought I’d give this a shot. I’m emailing you now because I’m having some major guy problems. I mean, I haven’t had this much drama since since my prom date Jason saw me DFMO with Kyle on the dance floor to “Love Story”. But, like, can I live?

So, about two weeks ago I met this really cute upperclassman guy at a totally exclusive party. He’s an athlete, and I think he plays football or like some sport where you throw things. Anyway, we ended up hanging out all night and I got to tell him all about my hopes and dreams for college. It was just sooo refreshing to talk to such mature guy about mature things, totally not like conversations with my high school boyfriend. Then, before I went back to New South, he said “Emma, can I get your number?” And I was like “sure,” even though my name’s actually Becca. But like, they both end in “A” so he probably just misheard me, right?

Now this guy has been texting nonstop for the past two weeks. He’ll usually text me some time between 2 a.m. and 3 a.m., which is kind of late but it’s nice to know that he’s thinking of me! Most of the time he’ll just text me things like “yo” or “sup,” but that’s enough for me to know that he’s totally into me. Sometimes I respond with really long texts about my day or what I ate at Leo’s, but he usually doesn’t respond to those. I figure he’s probably fallen asleep because he has practice early in the morning.

Anyway, last night he changed things up with his texts and at 2:32 a.m. texted me “Netflix and chill?” I was so confused at first, like what does his text mean? Why does he want to watch a movie so late?? Is this a date??? 4E, please help me! I just really need to know what his text means.

Becca in New South

Dear Becca,

We’re glad you decided to reach out to us at 4E, because we’ve definitely got a lot of advising to do for your situation.

First off, we definitely agree that this super cute upperclassman guy must be into you. As for the instance of him calling you Emma rather than Becca, he definitely didn’t mishear you. While some people call their significant others “babe” or “bae,” he opted to think outside of the box by calling you Emma. Think of it as a compliment, you only spent a few hours telling him your hopes and dreams before you scored that pet name! If that’s not love, then I don’t know what is.

As for his late night texts, don’t worry about how late he’s sending them. Guys in college spend a lot of time doing homework, and are known to pull all-nighters when their professors assign a lot of optional reading for class. If anything, you should be flattered by the fact that you’re the first thing he thinks about when he’s done with all of his assignments! The fact that he’s also able to formulate such coherent thoughts as “yo” or “sup” after a full night of hitting the books is also commendable.

Now, in regards to his most recent text, you should know that this is in fact his way of not only asking you on a date but also asking you to be his girlfriend. You don’t want to Netflix and chill with just anyone, it’s just way too personal! I mean think about it, would you really be comfortable with anyone apart from your significant other seeing all those Disney movies and weird documentaries in your “recently watched” section? Yeah, we didn’t think so. Our best advice is to text him back ASAP, set up a convenient time to Netflix and chill and find the longest movie possible. (Note: We recommend anything by Nicholas Sparks.)

Much Love,

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, gizmodo.com

November 23, 2014

Party Themes 2.0

Whiteout. Anything But Clothes. Toga. Flannels and handles. In a report released this afternoon by the Frat Boy Association of America (FBAA), these time-honored, critically acclaimed college party themes have all earned the widely sought-after “ratchet” status.

These findings reveal a lack of innovation across the board. Although these classics never fail to deliver their fair share of jungle juice, Natty, crop tops and shame, we at 4E believe it’s time to make some cutting-edge contributions to today’s antiquated party theme options.

Your Favorite Handle

A good party theme is all about the double entendre/puns. Sport @yourfavoritetwitteraccount on your T-shirt or dress up like your favorite flavor of Burnett’s. Recommendations include @LILBTHEBASEDGOD and @amandabynes. If you go the vodka route, get creative with your flavor choice. Tropical punch, perhaps. Just not maple syrup because we told you that’s disgusting.

I Woke Up Like This

Channel your inner Sasha Fierce or wear slippers and a nightgown. This theme presents a juxtaposition between divas and bedheads that will keep the party interesting. There is also the opportunity to put the absolute maximum or the bare minimum effort into the costume depending on whether you choose to be Bey or a lazy pajama-clad college student for the night. Earn extra points by merging the two and somehow finding a way to pull off being Beyoncé in a onesie.

Basic and Basic

Although the term “basic” has started to grind my gears, it has party theme potential. Either incorporate some chemistry knowledge into your outfit via a cute and flirty pH scale drawing on your tank top or opt for yoga pants and Uggs (with the fur rolled down) while toting around a Starbucks holiday cup.

Middle School Dance and Cargo Pants

This theme aims to take you back to your school gym in the seventh grade. Party attire can include a combination of any of the following elements: Apple Bottom jeans, denim mini skirt, pink Converse, a choker and/or a Juicy Couture track jacket. For the boys, cargo pants with so many pockets that you could simultaneously store all of your Yu-Gi-Oh cards within them. (Also acceptable: those sweatpants with fifteen zippers that allowed one to change from pants to capris to shorts to boxer-length shorts in a few easy unzips). If you’re not chasing your drinks with Sunny D and following those body shots with a sip of Capri Sun, you’re doing it wrong.

And that’s all for now. Use these last days before Thanksgiving to give these themes a try or hold out until your last free weekend before finals. Because you can only dress in ABC so many times before you start to realize it’s cold out.

Photo: noisey.com

November 17, 2014

5 Snapchats You Definitely Got This Weekend

Picture this. It’s Sunday morning and find yourself ~~waking up bright and early~~ rolling out of bed around 11:30 a.m. with a pounding headache. Your Brita pitcher is all the way across the room in your fridge, which is obviously too difficult to get to, so you get back in bed and reach for your phone. It’s 5% charged, so naturally you use your dwindling battery power to check out your snaps and see what everyone else was up to last night. Here’s what you’re most likely to see:

Unintelligibly Screaming Girls: You have absolutely no idea what these girls are all screaming about, but they clearly seem pretty distressed. Was there a spider? Did Starbucks suddenly stop serving their specialty holiday drinks? Oh wait, they might just be attempting to sing “Blank Space” at the top of their lungs and horribly off-key. Either way, it’s too early for this much noise so you skip to the next snap before your eardrums burst.
With Bae: What exactly is bae? Sometimes it’s a significant other and sometimes it’s Eat & Joy pizza, it all depends on who you ask. This snap with either remind you just how single you are or — more realistically — how quickly you could devour an entire pizza at the moment.
#SoCollege: Some people just want to remind you that they’re in college, you know in case you forgot or something? That’s why they take every opportunity they can to document the #mostcollege things they see to send you over Snapchat. Vat of mystery punch? Crowded Village B dance party? Casual DFMO at Brown House? Basically the epitome of #College.
“Havingtoook mcjh funnn”: This Snap will most likely be a selfie of someone who looks like they’ve been having a little too much fun all night long. You’ll crack a smile when you see this one and give yourself a little pat on the back because you’re probably having a better morning than this friend.
Netflix Night: You’ll open this Snap and instantly dislike whoever sent it to you. While your friend may have captioned it “Night in!”, they might as well have written “Haha hope that headache doesn’t last all day!”. Forget about giving yourself a pat on the back as this snap serves as a reminder that you still have to write two essays and study for three midterms.

After looking through a few of the Snaps you received, your phone dies so you decide to crawl back under the covers. Waking up before noon is too difficult anyway …

Gifs: tumblr.com; Photo: thoughtcatalog.com

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