The Five People You’ll Meet on the DC Metro this Summer

DC MetroAs Hoyas, we try to break the bubble as much possible, which means that we’ll likely take a trip on the metro at some point. You’ll probably meet an interesting array of people so here’s a catalog of these people to help you out.

1. The Business Professional

These “yopros” may be annoying, but for many Georgetown students this may be your future. They’re always impeccably dressed with their suits and briefcases and as you travel further into the political heart of DC, you’ll notice that they all have a government-issued security badge. The fresher the hire, the more prominently displayed the badge. They’ll spend most of the ride glued to their smartphone in an attempt to appear productive and important. They’re mostly rush-hour Metro patrons and carry that no-nonsense attitude with them all the time. If you block them on the escalator prepare to be body-slammed.

2. The Tourist

While this breed of Metro-rider is only seen at certain times of the day, the mighty Tourist is a constant presence. Their guide books will tell them to stay away from the Green & Yellow lines (which is stupid) and they will most likely be found on the Blue & Orange lines loudly counting down the stops until the Smithsonian station where they will all depart. Chances are that they will be wearing matching running shoes, fanny packs and tacky Washington D.C. t-shirts and will have a particularly noticeable regional accent. These are the people who stand on the left side of the escalator and take up two seats for one person during rush hour. They just don’t get it.

3. The Family

This type is similar to the Tourist, but the Family unit is ten times worse because they come with loud unruly children. Even if they aren’t tourists, kids have a way of almost getting shut in doors and causing general mayhem. The worst is when parents try to bring strollers into the crowded car and are surprised – mad even – when it doesn’t really fit. They shout, they move around a lot, they miss their stops a lot – they are the embodiment of a Metro nightmare.

4. The Probably Homeless Person

This guy may be homeless, or he may just be making a unique personal lifestyle choice, but he certainly does smells very strange. This person probably has a fairly large collection of empty seats around them – this is partly due to the smell, and partly due to the fact that he may be talking to himself. Even though he may be a perfectly nice person, it’s probably best to give him some space.

5. You

You’re either commuting to your internship or exploring more of the city, but you know enough of the unspoken Metro rules to get by. You have learned to not stand on the left side of the escalators, to not sit in the handicapped seats and, even though you probably don’t know exactly where you’re going, you definitely learned not to discuss that fact too loudly. You’re really just trying to take advantage of everything DC has to offer, and the Metro is the easiest way to do that.

Photo: Anamsong

The Five People You’ll Meet in a GAAP Facebook Group

Gaining acceptance into Georgetown meant many things to all of us: congratulatory cards from relatives you haven’t talked to in years, celebratory dinners with friends and family, a plethora of letters and pamphlets with a zillion confusing acronyms from the university itself, and then the most exciting thing of all…officially joining the GAAP Facebook Group.

Some of you probably went straight online following the good news, “liking” Georgetown University on Facebook, updating your status, hardcore browsing the bookstore’s website for some Hoya gear, and finally joining the group that you had most likely been stalking for quite some time now.

With acceptance letters to the Class of 2017 officially out, we at the 4E thought it would be idea to take stock of “The Five People You’ll Meet in a GAAP Facebook Group”:

1. The Curious One This incoming freshman has a lot of questions about his/her incoming classmates as well as life on the Hilltop. Common questions include, “Who is from Jersey? JERSEY PRIDE :)” or “Is anyone going to GAAP weekend the 14th? If so, message me we can meet up!!” or “Wait did anyone get their NetId yet?” or even “PLEASE tell me someone likes The Princess Bride as much as I do or I am going to have to transfer. Haha just kidding! But seriously.” The Curious One shoots out questions that can range from any and all topics. Tip for incoming froshies: Although it is great to get to know your fellow classmates, don’t be that guy who posts questions in the group 24/7. You will come to regret it.

2. The “She Doesn’t Even Go Here” This person either doesn’t go to Georgetown or is not in the group’s specified class. They are either there to impart wisdom, spam the group, advertise their respective student groups. You may very well become one of these people some day!

3. The “So, Who is Ready to Party Next Year?!” One Ah, yes. The classic soon to be freshman in college who can only think about the crazy freshman year they are about to experience. This person is beyond excited to leave those high school days behind and get straight to business. There will usually be a significant amount of likes and comments on this person’s post. Although people might say this is exactly what not to do on a GAAP Facebook Group, we have all seen at least one over zealous kiddo who just couldn’t help it.

4. The “Sign Up For This and You Can Get 15% Off” One In all honestly, I don’t really know who these mysterious spammers are. Do they go to Georgetown? What year are they? Can you really get that iPhone for free if you sign up for that monthly newsletter? All I know is that these spammers frequent the GAAP group on the reg. so watch out little freshies and only partake in what you know is legit.

5. You You check the group every now and then when you’re bored in lecture, or post to sell your ticket for the basketball game when you have too many midterms that week. You think the Facebook group try-hards could use a hobby, but the group is useful when you’re advertising an event.